“Motherfucker. She leaves me no choice. Now I have to break her self-esteem, sleep with her and steal the shirt.”

“Don’t leave me with her. What if her car breaks down, she’s a killer, or she brushes her teeth with mayonnaise?”

“She hadn't realised how low her self esteem had been, first during her relationship, when she tried to turn herself into someone else, and then when recovering from the break up.Because however much she was a part of the decision to break up, she still felt bruised and battered, never thought she'd have the energy to go through all this again with someone new.It has been so much easier, since they separated, to be cocooned with her family, to nest in her cosy home and allow life to carry on for others, outside the safety of her house.”

“And that other self, who watches me from the distance of decades,what will she say? Will she look at me with hatred or with compassion,I whose choices made her what she will be?”

“The surest path to positive self-esteem is to succeed at something which one perceived would be difficult. Each time we steal a student’s struggle by insisting they do work too easy for them, we steal their opportunity to have an esteem-building experience.”

“Cal," I whisper into her sleep, "if you go, you know what? You'll break my liver." I want to pretend that it's a joke, that she will wake up and laugh with me, throwing her head back the way she did last night, bit this time the words are true . . . she will break my liver, break my heart, kill everything inside alive inside me.”