“But Christina and I are not people who cry together; we're people who fight together. SO I hold my tears in.”

“I think they know we're talking about them," I say."So? They already know I hate them.""They do? How?"Christina fakes a smile at them and waves. I look down, my cheeks warm. I shouldn't be gossiping anyway. Gossiping is self-indulgent.Will hooks a foot around one of Al's legs and yanks back,knocking Al to the ground. Al scrambles to his feet."Because I've told them," she says, through the gritted teeth of her smile. Her teeth are straight on top and crooked on the bottom.She looks at me. "We try to be pretty honest about our feelings in Candor. Plenty of people have told me that they don't like me.And plenty of people haven't. Who cares?""We just...weren't supposed to hurt people," I say."I like to think I'm helping them by hating them," she says. "I'm reminding them that they aren't God's gift to humankind.”

“Question," says Christina, leaning forward. "The leaders who were watching your fear landscape...they were laughing at something.""Oh?" I bite my lip hard. "I'm glad my terror amuses them.""Any idea which obstacle it was?" she asks."No.""You're lying," she says. "You always bite the inside of your cheek when you lie. It's your tell."I stop biting the inside of my cheek."Will's is pinching his lips together, if it makes you feel better," she adds.Will covers his mouth immediately."Okay,fine.I was afraid of...intimacy," I say."Intimacy," repeats Chrstina. "Like...sex?"I tense up.And force myself to nod.Even if it was just Christina, and no one else was around,I would still want to strangle her right now. I go over a few ways to inflict maximum injury with minimum force in my head. I try to throw flames from my eyes.Will laughs."What was that like?" she says. "I mean,did someone just...try to do it with you? Who was it?""Oh,you know. Faceless...unidentifiable male," I say. "How were your moths?""You promised you would never tell!" cries Christina,smacking my arm."Moths," repeats Will. "You're afraid of moths?""Not just a cloud of moths," she says, "like...a swarm of them. Everywhere. All those wings and legs and..." She shudders and shakes her head."Terrifying," Will says with mock seriousness. "That's my girl. Tough as cotton balls.""Oh,shut up.”

“I am your instructor", he says."My name is Four".Christina asks, "Four? Like the number?""Yes", Four says. "Is there a problem?""No.""Good. We're about to go into the Pit, which you will someday learn to love. It-"Christina snickers. "The Pit? Clever name."Four walks up to Christina and leans his face close to hers. His eyes narrow, and for a second he just stares at her."What's your name?" he asks quietly."Christina", she squeaks."Well, Christina, if I wanted to put up with Candor smart-mouths, I would have joined their faction", he hisses. "The first lesson you will learn from me is to keep your mouth shut.Got that?”

“Without thinking, I grab Al's arm and squeeze it as tightly as I can. I just need something to hold on to. Blood runs down the side of Christina's face and splatters on the ground next to her cheek. This is the first time I have ever prayed for someone to fall unconscious....Al frees his hand and pulls me tight to his side. I clench my teeth to keep from crying out.”

“The shouts of triumph become infectious, and I lift my voice to join in, running toward my teammates. Christina holds the flag up high, and everyone clusters around her, grabbing her arm to lift the flag even higher. I can't reach her, so I stand off to the side, grinning.A hand touches my shoulder."Well done," Four says quietly.”

“My problem might be that even if I did go home, I wouldn’t belong there, among people who give without thinking and care without trying.”