“I have discovered that sitting still leaves little spaces for the grief to get in, so I stay busy.”

“I feel the monster of grief again, writhing in the empty space where my heart and stomach used to be. I gasp, pressing both palms to my chest. Now the monstrous thing has its claws around my throat, squeezing my airway. I twist and put my head between my knees, breathing until the strangled feeling leaves me.”

“Dauntless,' he says. 'I was born for Abnegation. I was planning on leaving Dauntless, and becoming factionless. But then I met her, and...I felt like maybe I could make something more of my decision.' Her. For a moment, it's like I'm looking at a different person, sitting in Tobias's skin, one whose life is not as simple as I thought. He wanted to leave Dauntless, but he stayed because of me. He never told me that.”

“Do they have to be so public?” I say."She just kissed him." Al frowns at me. When he frowns, his thick eyebrows touch his eyelashes. "It’s not like they’re stripping naked.""A kiss is not something you do in public."Al, Will, and Christina all give me the same knowing smile.“What?” I say.“Your Abnegation is showing,” says Christina. “The rest of us are all right with a little affection in public.”“Oh.” I shrug. “Well...I guess I’ll have to get over it, then.”“Or you can stay frigid,” says Will, his green eyes glinting with mischief. “You know. If you want.”

“I get up, because I’m supposed to, but if it were up to me, I’d stay in my seat for the rest of time.”

“Do you know him well?" I ask.I am too curious; I always have been."Everyone knows Four," she says. "We were initiates together.I was bad at fighting,so he taught me every night after everyone was asleep." She scratches the back of her neck, her expression suddenly serious. "Nice of him."She gets up and stands behind the members sitting in the doorway. In a second, her serious expression is gone,but I still feel rattled by what she said, half confused by the idea of Four being "nice" and half wanting to punch her for no apparent reason.”

“The only reason I haven't shot you yet is because he's the one who should get to do it," I say. "Stay away from him or I'll decide I no longer care.”