“That werewolf fantasy would be a hard one to pull off. She'd have to troll through the forest in high heels, just praying one of the scruffy campers was actually a raving beast.”

“I would have to spend the afternoon shopping. I hate to shop. I considered it one of the life's necessary evils, like brussels sprouts and high-heeled shoes.”

“Puck laughed, and it wasn't like that weird high-pitched giggle she'd heard out of children before, the one that begged the question: why would one possibly tickle a child just to elicit that noise? ”

“When I went to Catholic high school in Philadelphia, we just had one coach for football and basketball. He took all of us who turned out and had us run through a forest. The ones who ran into the trees were on the football team. ”

“I'm not the world's greatest expert, but I would have thought that the wizards, witches, trolls, unicorns, ... broomsticks and spells would have given her a clue?' - when J.K. Rowling insisted she wasn't writing fantasy.”

“Actually, you’re way off.”“Oh?” the guard asked.“Yup. She’s not a werewolf, she’s a chupacabra. Have you noticed a lot of missing goats lately?”