“I have the confidence of a killer whale, but being shot down by these losers stings.”

“This morning, I'm relishing the perks of working for the Underworld. I press my foot down on the accelerator, and the deep rumble of my candy apple-red Escalade growls. My new baby girl has black leather, Bose surround sound, and twenty-two inch rimes. Match.com couldn't have created a happier couple.”

“All the way down the stairs and into the kitchen, Charlie yaps away. I nod and smile and smile and nod, and when she turns away, I form a gun with my hand, place it to my temple, and pull the trigger.”

“He reaches down and tugs his pant leg up. The gold cuff wrapped around his ankle is decorated with Smurf stickers. "One of the other collectors did this after I crashed last night. Can you believe that mess? I can't get the damn things off.”

“I will protect this girl with everything I have, because if something happens to her, I will lose myself. I will cease to exist.And I will take everyone with me.”

“Speak up, Charlie,” I say. “If you have something to say, then say it out loud.”

“Is this happening?” I’msurprised to hear my own voiceand decide right then and therethat I have a positively perfectMan Voice.”