“Some people try to find things in this game that don't exist but football is only two things - blocking and tackling.”

“Resolve to do the things you find to be difficult. That's what confident people do. They tackle those things that are scary and they get addicted to doing it.”

“But the thing I’m finding out is some people don’t really appreciate it when you’r trying to be helpful.”

“Tried to escape, to block out the fact that I was being eaten alive by arachnids. For some reason the only thing I could replace it with was the image of being eaten by tiny clowns.”

“I don't know much about football, but when I see one player take his opponent down with a gruesome flying tackle, I can’t help but have immediate, newfound respect. Any derby girl worth her skates would kill to throw a block like that.”

“Listen, baby, people do funny things. Specially us. The cards are stacked against us and just trying to stay in the game, stay alive and in the game, makes us do funny things. Things we can't help. Things that make us hurt one another. We don't even know why.”