“Dogs have important jobs, like barking when the doorbell rings, but cats have no function in a house whatsoever.”

“Dogs have hair. Cats, fur.Dogs whine, yip, howl, bark. Cats purrr.I say: No contest.”

“When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you.”

“I often think about dogs when I think about work and retirement. There are many breeds of dog that just need to be working, and useful, or have a job of some kind, in order to be happy. Otherwise they are neurotically barking, scratching, or tearing up the sofa. A working dog needs to work. And I am a working dog.”

“I don't think that type should be expressive at all. I can write the word 'dog' with any typeface and it doesn't have to look like a dog. But there are people that [think that] when they write 'dog' it should bark.”

“When the doorbell rings at three in the morning, it's never good news.”