“When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty.”
“Was I in here last night and did I spend a $20 bill?Oh, thank goodness... I thought I'd lost it.”
“What contemptible scoundrel stole the cork from my lunch?”
“It is funnier to bend things than to break them.”
“I always keep some whiskey handy in case I see a snake...which I also keep handy.”
“I like children. If they're properly cooked.”
“Take me down to the bar! We'll drink breakfast together!”