“When's the party?' Cam asked toying with her. 'Tonight.''Nope, sorry. I have an appointment tonight with Katie Holmes and her Disturbing Behavior.”

“Cam stepped inside the music and let it close around her like a bubble.”

“Cam lifted the back of the U-Haul door to find Perry holding up a pair of Nana's enormous, silky white underpants.'Whoops,' said Cam. 'You'll have to make do.' And she shut the door, ignoring Perry's continued pounding on the side of the trailer.'I packed some cute stuff for her, too,' Asher said regretfully.”

“Get used to that, Nana. He has a way of appearing out of thin air.''Oh my. Asher. Hm. Hm. Hm. Turn around. He's beautiful, Campbell. Are you schtupping my granddaughter?' she asked him.'No, ma'am.''Well, I give you my permission.'And just liked that, Cam's love life was ruined forever. If and when she ever 'schtupped' Asher, she'd have to do everything she could not to think of her grandmotehr.”

“This is the part of the horror film where you yell at the girl on the screen,'Don't *go*. You idiot! Don't go! Why are they always so stupid?' Cam *told* her mom he could be a serial killer.”

“Just go with it. You are a princess.''What does that *mean*, though?' Cam asked. 'How-''Oh, my God, Campbell. Be quiet!' He laughed.”

“Old people always exaggerate the danger and lawlessness of their youth, thought Cam, because their adult lives have become so boring.”