“…if I become an admitted pet owner, then I have to pay not only a several hundred dollar deposit to the apartment complex, but I’m pretty sure that they also reserve the right to harvest some of my bodily organs…”

“I had a plan, all right, ... I was also pretty sure no one on my list of allies was going to like it.”

“Is it really necessary to reward the CEO with several million dollars? Why isn’t it logical or common sense to pay the minimum-wage employee another quarter, give a quarterly fifty-dollar bonus, or even provide a two-hundred-dollar gas gift card?”

“I need a hundred dollars and some suction”

“we all know he pays hundreds of dollars for his shoes, but we are going to be paying hundreds of dollars for his flip flops~ Dem Convention 2008”

“Perhaps you are thinking: 'But a tank costs several million dollars, not including floor mats. I don't have that kind of money.'Don't be silly. You're a consumer, right? You have credit cards, right?Perhaps you are thinking: 'Yes, but how am I going to pay the credit-card company?'Don't be silly. You have a tank, right?”