“Elizabeth was astounded, and immediately colored."Put down those damn crayons and look at me!" Darcy commanded.”

“Mr Bennet sat taciturn, staring at his magazine and waiting for the invention of television.”

“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good riding crop must be in want of a pair of bare buttocks to trash.”

“I do not make love, Miss Bennet," he had told her."I bonk. I have it off. I get my end way, I rodger, I boff.”

“Grief fills the room up of my absent child,Lies in his bed, walks up and down with me,Puts on his pretty look, repeats his words,Remembers me of his gracious parts,Stuffs out his vacant garments with his form”

“And that's when she put her book down. And looked at me. And said it: "Life isn't fair, Bill. we tell our children that it is, but it's a terrible thing to do. It's not only a lie, it's a cruel lie. Life is not fair, and it never has been, and it's never going to be.”

“Well, Bud," he said, looking at me, "I'll be damned if you don't go to a lot of trouble to have your fun. Kidnapping, then fighting. What do you do on your holidays? Burn houses?”