“I would like to take you seriously but to do so would affront your intelligence.”

“I won't insult your intelligence by suggesting that you really believe what you just said.”

“I would rather be governed by the first 2000 people in the Manhattan phone book than the entire faculty of Harvard.”

“I would sooner be governed by the first two thousand names in the Boston telephone directory than by the two thousand members of the faculty of Harvard.”

“I profoundly believe it takes a lot of practice to become a moral slob.”

“Truth is a demure lady, much too ladylike to knock you on your head and drag you to her cave. She is there, but people must want her, and seek her out.”

“For people who like that sort of thing, that's the sort of thing they like.”