“There is no question that there is an unseen world. The problem is, how far is it from midtown and how late is it open?”

“Maugham then offers the greatest advice anyone could give to a young author: "At the end of an interrogation sentence, place a question mark. You'd be surprised how effective it can be.”

“How is it possible to find meaning in a finite world, given my waist and shirt size?”

“God, you Jews are truly exotic."Exotic? She should only know the Greenblatts. Or Mr. and Mrs. Milton Sharpstein, my father's friends. Or for that matter, my cousin Tovah. Exotic? I mean, they're nice, but hardly exotic with their endless bickering over the best way to combat indigestion or how far back to sit from the television set.”

“Because it's much more pleasant to be obsessed over how the hero gets out of his predicament than it is over how I get out of mine.”

“Is Knowledge knowable? If not, how do we know?”

“All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we choose to distort it.”