“Anyone who uses more than two chords is just showing off.”
“You can't trust a guy showing off more cleavage than you.”
“Never trust anyone who uses the word party as a verb but never trust anyone who would rather be grammatically correct than to party.”
“The trouble with real life is that you don't know whether you're the hero or just some nice chap who gets bumped off in chapter five to show what a rotter the villain is without anyone minding too much.”
“Anyone who conducts an argument by appealing to authority is not using his intelligence; he is just using his memory.”
“And it's not that Pearl Jam was any more amazing than anyone else. I think we just liked who we were when they were who they were.”