“What can you do with a character who responds to everything by either punching it or deploying Bat Anti-thing Spray. . . then punching it?”

“The cruelest thing you can do to an artist is tell them their work is flawless when it isn't”

“With small-town America it's always either zombies or communists isn't it.”

“What were they going to do after killing the president, declare themselves king?”

“This is about as simple as games get. There isn't even the paltriest context for what you're doing; you're not exacting revenge on limbless pigs or feeding your pet bitch-lizard. You're a ninja, fruit is flying up in front of you, and fuck fruit. Sitting around all smug on trees and in pies.”

“Nothing ruins a good thing quite like knowing you share your opinions with mindless little tits.”

“Making the decision to leave Valve strikes me as right up there with turning down the throne to Narnia, but then call me an idealist, and I guess I probably wouldn't want to spend my whole life making new hats for Team Fortress 2 either.”