“At last I managed to haul it aboard. It was over three feet long. The bucket was useless. It would fit the dorado like a hat.”

“There are three reasons why men of genius have long hair. One is, that they forget it is growing. The second is, that they like it. The third is, that it comes cheaper; they wear it long for the same reason they wear their hats long.”

“It went on. Each lie I told required another to thicken the paste over the previous. It was useless, like when I learned to crochet and made a long string of loops. Being useless builds character, Miss Paulsen had said. Perhaps she was home now, drinking a weak Earl Grey from last night’s tea bag, massaging her taffied scalp.”

“A loving soul was always more beautiful over the long haul, but actual prettiness was fleeting.”

“I was going, going, gone-like falling off the side of a cliff in the movies-until I managed to find a foothold and stop myself. But who knew how long it would last? That bit of rock or vine always gives out, doesn't it? The only question was when.”

“The occupational hazard of making a spectacle of yourself, over the long haul, is that at some point you buy a ticket too.”