Jeaniene Frost

“Much slower, I turned around to see Vlad examining his fingernails, as if his hands weren't still ablaze in the flames that had blasted the ghoul's head off moments before.'what the hell was that?' I gasped.'Premature inflammation,' He replied. 'Happens sometimes. Very embarrassing, I don't like to talk about it.' ”

“Am I the only one who has wood over that little vixen?”

“What the hell was that?” I gasped. “Premature inflammation,” he replied. “Happens sometimes. Very embarrassing. I don’t like to talk about it.”

“She seemed to be a nice person, too, instead of a homicidal bitch like his former wife. Otherwise, the world should fear. When Mencheres fell for a woman, he fell hard. If Kira asked for her own continent as a birthday present, Mencheres would probably have one conquered for her before she blew out her candles.”

“Denise clung to the feel of his hands as she pushed at her panic. It's okay. You're safe...and this has got to be the ugliest couch ever.”

“Are you having performance issues?” I asked in surprise. “Bite your tongue,” Vlad said, with a snort. “I was seeing if Dermot understood sign language, but from the look on his face, it seems not.”

“Kitten, your hands are heaven and your eyes are my home.”

“No matter what happens, you will never lose me, I am forever yours, Kitten, in this life or the next.”

“I’d heard Bones threaten to beat someone with their own limb before, but I’d always assumed that was a figure of speech. Apparently not.”

“…well just call me Hannibal Lecter. With cleavage.”

“See?” I’d whispered to Bones, nudging him with a grin. “He never argues with her. Isn’t that sweet?”A snort preceded his response. “Keep dreaming, pet.”

“Try not to think too often, you'll only hurt yourself”

“I know you think I was pressured into binding myself with you before, but that's not true,I always intended to marry you, kitten.”

“Charles,” Bones said distinctly. “You’d better have a splendid explanation for her being on top of you.”The black-haired vampire rose to his feet as soon as I jumped off, brushing the dirt off his clothes.“Believe me, mate, I’ve never enjoyed a woman astride me less. I came out to say hello, and this she-devil blinded me by flinging rocks in my eyes. Then she vigorously attempted to split my skull before threatening to impale me with silver if I so much as eventwitched! It’s been a few years since I’ve been to America, but I daresay the method of greeting a person has changeddramatically!”Bones rolled his eyes and clapped him on the shoulder. “I’m glad you’re still upright, Charles, and the only reason you are is because she didn’t have any silver. She’d have staked you right and proper otherwise. She has a tendency to shrivel someone firstand then introduce herself afterwards.”

“Spade-“If you’d refrain from slamming my face any more into this dirty rock floor, I’ll do whatever you like,” was his even reply. “Fancyletting my head go?”Cat-“Sure,” I said with an unpleasant snicker, not relinquishing an ounce of pressure. “How about I let you floss with my jugular aswell? I don’t think so.”

“I stared at him in silence. There were so many things I wanted to say. Like, How could you think what I feel for you is only physical? or, Don't you know you're my best friend? and finally, Bones, I love-”

“Wow,” Tate whispered. “They’re fucking right on the dance floor. ”“I see that.” There was an edge to my words.Dave gave me a sideways grin. “Juan will cry at being stuck in the van. If he were here, he’d be screaming 'Authenticity’s imperative!' and taking his pants down.”

“Before we go, I gotta know: If mind-reading abilities are real, there's something else I wondered if fiction got right about vampires-""Ask me if I sparkle and I'll kill you where you stand," Bones cut him off with utmost seriousness.”

“...that left Francesca to slink into the chair opposite us. My feeling of superiority was short-lived, however, when she settled herself down and then crossed her legs.I didn't need a mirror to know my whole face had just turned red. With a hemline up to her thighs that gesture didn't leave anything to the imagination. Bones curled his fingers around mine and squeezed. His hand was still warmed from our contact moments ago. That's how fast he had to grab me again to keep me sitting where I was instead of yanking off my jacket to make her a pair of panties.”

“life's a bitch, and then one stabs you.”

“Lucifer's bouncing balls, Kitten, not again!"Uh-oh. I squirmed, instinctively also trying to block Tony's body from his view. As if that made him any less dead."She was going to stab you," I said in my defense. "Look in her hand!"He was looking at the ground near my feet instead. "Him, too?"I nodded, sheepish. "He jumped me."Bones just stared. "You're not a woman," he said finally. "You're the Grim Reaper with red hair!”

“I'm glad you're still upright, Charles, and the only reason you are is because she didn't have any silver. She'd have staked you right and proper otherwise. She has a tendency to shrivel someone first and then introduce herself afterwards.""That's uncalled for!" I said, insulted at the suggestion that I was homicidal."Right." Bones let that go. "Kitten, this is my best mate, Charles, but you can call him Spade. Charles, this is Cat, the woman I've been telling you about. You can see for yourself that everything I've said is... an understatement.”

“Anytime you want to lay off the paybacks God, that'd be great.”

“So do you remember this place?" "Hard to forget." he snorted. "This is where you tried to kill me. You were so nervous, you kept blushing. Never had someone try to stake me who blushed so much.”

“And that, Annette, is called Pilates”

“I’m in, Cat. I’d never leave you. Especially when you’ve got death breathing down your neck.” “Very funny,” I retorted, since Bones was inches from my throat”

“I can’t wait to find out how you taste, and you won’t want me to stop even after I’ve completely exhausted you. You’ll think you were on fire, your skin will burn. I’ll suck all of your juices out of you. And then I’ll drink your blood.”

“I thawt I thaw a putty tat.” “I did, I did thee a putty tat" Finished with his Tweety Bird imitation, he grinned unpleasantly at me. “Now, then, luv, let’s get down to business”

“There is no way I’m going out in public like this!”It seemed while I was being tormented at the salon, Bones had been out shopping. I didn’t ask where he got the money from, images of old folks with their necks bleeding and their wallets missing dancing in my head. There were boots, earrings, push-up bras, skirts, and something he swore to me were dresses but only looked like pieces of dresses.”

“You! You tricked me! I never want to see you or that bottle of liquid arsenic again!”I chucked the empty moonshine jug at him. Or tried to. It missed him by a dozen feet.He picked it up in astonishment. “You drank the whole bloody thing? You were only supposed to have a few sips!”“Did you say that? Did you?” He reached me just as I felt the ground tip. “Didn’t say anything. I’ve got those names, so that’s all that matters, but you men…you’re all alike. Alive, dead, undead—all perverts! I had a drunken pervert in my pants! Do you know how unsanitary that is?”Bones held me upright. I would have protested, but I couldn’t remember how to. “What are you saying?”“Winston poltergeisted my panties, that’s what!” I announced with a loud hiccup.“Why, you scurvy, lecherous spook!” Bones yelled in the direction of the cemetery. “If my pipes still worked, I’d go right back there and piss on your grave!”

“Ah, mistress, you’re an angel. Sure there’s not a drop left? I might have remembered one more person….”“Up yours,” I said rudely with another belch. “It’s empty. You should tell me the name anyway, after making me drink all that sewage.”Winston gave me a devious smile. “Come back with a full bottle and I will.”“Selfish spook,” I mumbled, and staggered away.I’d made it a few feet when I felt that distinct pins-and-needles sensation again, only this time it wasn’t in my throat.“Hey!”I looked down in time to see Winston’s grinning, transparent form fly out of my pants. He was chuckling even as I smacked at myself and hopped up and down furiously.“Drunken filthy pig!” I spat. “Bastard!”“And a good eve’in’ to you, too, mistress!” he called out, his edges starting to blur and fade. “Come back soon!”“I hope worms shit on your corpse!” was my reply. A ghost had just gotten to third base with me. Could I sink any lower?”

“I’m really not comfortable with you being naked,” I said, struggling for a normal tone and failing.His brow arched. “Why should it unsettle you, pet? After all, you just said I meant nothing to you beyond mere gratitude. And you’ve seen a man’s body before, so don’t pull that blushing act with me. What could be bothering you, then? I know what’s bothering me.” The smoothly bantering tone changed to a low, furious growl. “What’s bothering me is that you dare to stand there and tell me what I do and do not feel about last night. That kissing you and holding you meant nothing to me. Then, to top it all off, that you were only reacting to me because you were impaired! That’s rich. You know what those drugs did to you in the first dose, before the second one made you comatose? They killed the bug up your arse!”

“Playing with fire Kitten?”

“Some things we need to talk about, but not here. I'll see you later, darling.""No you won't, nut muffin!”

“Be good only if being bad ain't more fun.”

“this is my jam...”

“Do you think I’m pretty?” I heard myself ask. Something I couldn’t name flashed across his face. “No. I don’t think you’re pretty. I think you’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.”

“Ask me if I sparkle and I’ll kill you where you stand.” (Bones)”

“There is only one way to fight, and that's dirty. Clean gentlemanly fighting will get you nowhere but dead, and fast. Take every cheap shot, every low blow, absolutely kick people when they're down, and maybe you'll be the one who walks away.”

“Oh.” Timmie gave Bones a shy peek. “Are you Cathy’s brother?”“Whatever would give you the idea that I’m her damn brother?” Bones snapped.”

“I’ve never been jealous before I met you, it burns, luv. Like silver through my veins. Some nights, watching you with other men on your jobs, I think it will drive me mad. (Bones)”

“Time has no dominion over love. Love is the one thing that transcends time. (Bones)”

“You’d better not be messing with me. I like you, but if you’re feeding me a load of shit just to get some action, I’m going to plug a big silver stake right through your heart.(Cat)”

“I’ve wanted you from the moment we met, and if you think sitting next to me in your bra doesn’t overwhelm me with desire, you’re very wrong. I just don’t force myself where I’m not invited. (Bones)”

“Once you go dead, there's no one better in bed!" ~ Cat”

“I was thrown into a state of sheer, mindless panic. “It’s my mother!” I whispered fiercely,as if Bones hadn’t figured that out. “Holy shit, you have to hide!”I literally shoved him toward the bedroom, yelling, “I—I’ll be right there, I’m notdressed!”He went, but with none of my hysteria. “Kitten, you still haven’t told her? Blimey, whatare you waiting for?”The Second Coming of Christ!” I snapped. “And not a moment sooner! Here, in thecloset!”

“Be still my non-beating heart.”

“Ian waited outside the airport in the arrivals lane after they collected their bags. He looked at them and his brows rose. “Where’s Denise? And what are you doing with a bloody cat, Charles? Some sort of mascot for our dear Reaper here?” “Not another word,” Spade snapped, getting into the car and seating the carrier on his lap. “Ian, trust me—don’t,” Crispin said before he threw their bags into the boot.”

“It was clear they weren’t getting any information out of Ian tonight. She, Bones, and Cat followed as Spade supported Ian, almost carrying him up the stairs to then dump him on the bed in a guest room. “Before you go, mate, turn on the telly. Something raunchy, too. Think I’ll rub one off before I sleep.”

“Would you mind repeating that? I'm afraid I might have lost my wits altogether and just hallucinated what I've longed to hear.”