Sherrilyn Kenyon

“You’re really not right, are you?Yeah, I know. It was all the paint chips I ate as a kid. They were good, but chromosomally damaging. (Nick)”

“Not half as much as I’d miss me if you killed me. (He blinked like a girl and leaned against Ash’s shoulder.) Please don’t hurt me, Ash. Please. I don’t want to die while I’m still a virgin. At least let me get laid before you kill me – which according to my mom I can’t do until I’m married and I can’t do that until I finish college. So you have to wait a good ten years before you snuff me. Deal? (Nick)”

“Oh, come on. I have to know about the who-do voodoo that you do. (Nick)”

“What made you immortal? (Nick)Really good DNA. (Acheron)”

“By the way, don’t breathe on the upholstery or I may have to gut you. (Nick)”

“Hop in? Dude, are you out of your ever-loving mind? I can’t touch this. I might leave a fingerprint or something. (Nick)Oh the horror. Guess I’ll have to trade the piece of junk in and get a new one if that happens. (Acheron)”

“How can this be your car? (Nick)Well, I wrote a really big check that didn’t bounce to the dealer and then the most amazing thing happened…the salesman gave me the keys and let me take it home. It was like magic. (Acheron)”

“What are you? (Nick)Completely perplexed. You remember everything that happened. (Acheron)Yeah. Duh. Not like you’re going to forget the killer zombie stalkers and psyched-out kitchen staff. What kind of freak show is this? (Nick)”

“My demon ate them. (Nick)What happened to the jocks? (Acheron)Riiiight. And I suppose the Big Bad Wolf will be coming in right behind you to finish up? Or is it the Gingerbread Man I need to fear? (Nick)”

“I learned a long time ago not to judge people by what they look like, sound like, or by the clothes they wear. Just because a house is nice and shiny out front doesn’t mean it’s not rotting on the inside. (Kyrian)”

“My parents died a long time ago. And you know the sad thing? I still miss them every day. I spent my entire youth fighting with my dad over every little thing and damned if I wouldn’t sell my soul to see him one more time and tell him I was sorry for the last words I said to him. Words I can never take back that should have never been said. So call your mom. No matter what kind of relationship you have with your parents, I swear to you, you’ll miss them when they’re gone. (Kyrian)”

“We don’t need your pity. We get along just fine without it and them other things too. You don’t need electronic crap to live. You know, people lived for thousands of years without it. There’s a big difference between stuff you want and stuff you need. (Nick)”

“It’s four o’clock, guys. I’m going up to watch Oprah. Unless the shop catches fire or we’re under massive zombie invasion, I don’t exist for the next hour. On second thought, don’t bother me if it’s zombies – I’ll deal with them later. Today’s a special episode on how to make peace with people who piss you off. And I definitely need to find my Zen. (Bubba)Your Zen’s shooting stuff, Bubba. Embrace your inner violence. (Mark)Fine, then. My inner violence says I’ll cut your throat if you bother me until Oprah ends, so sod off. (Bubba)”

“Then why don’t you and Bubba have girlfriends? (Nick)I don’t want the drama of it. After the last one burnt up all my clothes with my Jack Daniel’s Black Label collection and tried to decapitate me with my CDs, I decided I’d take a hiatus for a bit. (Mark)”

“I was keeping Bubba from committing a felony. No offense, but ‘he’s a zombie, Your Honor, don’t electrocute me’ isn’t a viable excuse. Believe me, I know. My dad’s doing three life sentences ‘cause he killed, and I quote, ‘a crap load of demons who were trying to kill me and if I hadn’t killed them, Your Honor, they’d have taken over the city and enslaved all you petty, pathetic humans.’ They wouldn’t even let my dad plead insanity because of it. So trust me, ‘zombies needed killing’ isn’t a legit defense. (Nick)”

“What is that smell? (Nick)(It was like three-day-old cat vomit mixed with rotten asparagus.)Duck urine. It keeps the zombies from thinking I’m human. (Mark)Yeah, well it keeps me from thinking you’re sane. (Nick)”

“Are you sure I can’t catch it? (Nick)I’m positive. Believe me, I know my zombies. (Bubba)(Nick scoffed.) ‘Is it just me or is that like saying I know my elves and fairies?’ (Nick)”

“Man, first I’m shot, now I’m going to be a friggin’ zombie. At this rate, I’ll never live to have my first date or a driver’s license. Ah, gah! I’ve come too far to die a predestrian virgin. Bubba, you can’t let me die…I only have seventeen more months and three days to my sixteenth birthday! (Nick)”

“Nerd boy? Where he? (Biff)'Okay... sad that they couldn’t even form a complete sentence. See what happens when you abuse steroids? Dudes should have read the warning label. First the penis shrinks, then the sentence structure deteriorates. Next thing you know, you’re climbing to the top of the Empire State Building, swatting at planes with your over-sized fists.' (Nick)”

“He wanted to work in Hot Woman Valhalla until he died of testosterone poisoning. (Nick)”

“I got a shotgun and a backhoe and no one looks under a septic tank for a dead body. (Bubba)”

“But this…this kid wasn’t dead yet. Makes no sense to me. (Bubba)Maybe someone spiked his Wheaties? (Nick)”

“There’s right, troglodytes, ignore the only one who knows what’s going on. The only one who knows how to save your putrid, insignificant lives. Go back to your media-induced comas where you believe all the crap spieled by greedy politicians who control you with ill-conceived lies and consumer-driven distractions. (Bubba)”

“I’d rather be short, fat, and ugly than take after that man. (Nick)”

“Cause I’m gonna put my foot so far up their butts they’re going to burp shoe leather. (Nick)”

“It would have really cramped my future plans had I died. (Nick)”

“So why did you get shot? One of your witticisms go awry? (Nekoda)”

“Yeah, it’s me, but I like to think I looked better when we met. ‘Cause right now, I’m pretty much hogging all the ugly. (Nick)”

“You’re the only thing I’ve ever done right in my entire life and if anything ever happened to you, they’d have to dig two graves ‘cause I couldn’t live a single day without my baby beside me. (Cherise)”

“Where am I? (Nick)Hospital. (Kyrian)Really? No kidding? And here I thought I was at McDonald’s. (Nick)”

“Don’t let the past ruin your future. (Acheron)Meaning what, oh great Yoda? (Kyrian)You take care of the kid. I’ll take care of your patrol tonight. I could use the target practice. (Acheron)”

“Why are you talking to the King Loser Dork? You want to talk about ugly? Look at what he’s wearing. (Stone)I like a man who takes fashion chances. It’s the mark of someone who lives by his own code. A rebel. A real lone wolf is a lot sexier than a pack animal who follows orders and can’t have an opinion unless someone else gives it to him. (Nekoda)”

“Aren’t you a little old for your mom to be picking out your clothes for you? Really? Shopping at the Children’s Place at your age? I’m sure there’s some third-grader dying to know who bought the last navy I-sore shirt. (Nekoda)”

“(She grabbed him for a bear hug.)Stop sexually harassing me, Mom. (Nick)”

“I am a socially awkward mandork. (Nick)”

“When you love someone, truly love them, you lay your heart open to them. You give them a part of yourself that you give to no one else, and you let them inside a part of you that only they can hurt-you literally hand them the razor with a map of where to cut deepest and most painfully on your heart and soul. And when they do strike, it’s crippling-like having your heart carved out.”

“Los dioses no nos condenan, nos condenamos nosotros mismos con nuestras palabras y acciones.”

“La historia de la humanidad está escrita por personas que quieren algo que no pueden tener.”

“Siempre seremos conocidos por nuestras acciones. Déjales ser siempre los buenos.”

“Los sueños proveen un necesario escape para todo el mundo.”

“Nada jamás es fijado verdaderamente por el destino. En un parpadeo, todo cambia.”

“No es el dolor que nos infligen el que nos destruye. Es el dolor que dejamos dentro de nuestros corazones el que lo hace.”

“No hagas preguntas de las que ya sabes la respuesta.”

“No tienes miedo a morir cuando no tienes nada por lo que seguir viviendo.”

“No se trata de encontrar refugio en una tormenta. Se trata de aprender a bailar bajo la lluvia.”

“Quiero que siempre mantengas la cabeza alta y sigas tus sueños a donde te lleven. Ni siquiera escuches a la gente que te lastima o te hace llorar. Escucha a tu corazón y serás mejor que ellos. Nadie consigue salir adelante lastimando a otros. La única paz real que cualquiera puede tener es laúnica que viene sin eso. Vive tu vida en tus propios términos y haz de ella una vida feliz. Siempre. Eso es lo que importa. Nadie puede hacerte sentir inferior sin tu permiso. No se lo permitas. Date cuenta que son sus propias inseguridades las que hacen que te ataquen a ti y a otros. Son tan infelices consigo mismos que la única manera en la que pueden sentirse mejor es haciendo a todo el mundo tan infeliz como lo son ellos.”

“Siempre hay tres partes de un recuerdo, la tuya, la de los demás, y la verdad, que está en algún sitio en medio de las otras dos.”

“Tenemos tres tipos de familia: aquéllos de los que nacemos, aquéllos que nacen de nosotros y aquéllos que llevamos en el corazón.”

“¿Sentir? ¿Por qué alguien en su sano juicio desearía eso? Los sentimientos son para tontos.”

“Todos quieren a alguien que puedan poseer y amar. Alguien que esté allí para ayudarte a recoger los pedazos cuando todo se desmorona.”