Terry Pratchett

“Kako to izvodite?" rekao je. "Kako ja to izvodim? Je li to nekakva magija?"TO JE SVE, SAMO NIJE MAGIJA.”

“Bio je to osmijeh kakav zna strpljivo ležati na pješčanim sprudovima, iščekujući neoprezne plivače.”

“Kako se ono zovete? SMRT. (...)- Ne mogu tvrditi da sam čuo za tu tvrtku - rekao je Lezek. - A gdje vam je sjedište? OD NAJVEĆIH MORSKIH DUBINA, DO VISINA U KOJE SE SAMO ORAO MOŽE UZDIĆI, rekla je Smrt.- To je zbilja široko područje rada...”

“He was said to have the body of a twenty-five year old, although no one knew where he kept it.”

“Captain Quirke looked around the Watch room with the air of one who was doing the scenery a favour by looking at it.”

“gold, gold, gold, gold, gold, gold"'Is there a chorus?'"Gold, gold, gold, gold, gold".' said Hwel.'You left out a "gold" there.”

“It's always surprising to be reminded that while you're watching and thinking about people, all knowing and superior, they're watching and thinking about you, right back at you.”

“They can tak' oour lives but they canna tak' oour troousers!”

“.” Granny said, and cleared her bone-dry throat for a second try. “Esk?”

“The philosopher Didactylos has summed up an alternative hypothesis as "Things just happen. What the hell".”

“The trouble with witches is that they’ll never run away from things they really hate.And the trouble with small furry animals in a corner is that, just occasionally, one of them’s a mongoose.”

“This ain’t right, you know. She’s the one who ought to rule, fair enough. And you used magic to help her this far, and that’s all right. But it stops right here. It’s up to her what happens next. You can’t make things right by magic. You can only stop making them wrong.”Mrs. Gogol pulled herself up to her full, impressive height. “Who’s you to say what I can and can’t do here?”“We’re her godmothers,” said Granny.“That’s right,” said Nanny Ogg.“We’ve got a wand, too,” said Magrat.“But you hate godmothers, Mistress Weatherwax,” said Mrs. Gogol.“We’re the other kind,” said Granny. “We’re the kind that gives people what they know they really need, not what we think they ought to want.”

“I’ve got nothing but the greatest respect for Mrs. Gogol,” said Granny. “A fine woman. But talks a bit too much. If I was her, I’d have had a couple of big nails right through that thing by now.”“You would, too,” said Nanny. “It’s a good thing you’re good, ain’t it.”

“Cheery was aware that Commander Vimes didn't like the phrase 'The innocent have nothing to fear', believing the innocent had everything to fear, mostly from the guilty but in the longer term even more from those who say things like 'The innocent have nothing to fear'.”

“Ordinary fortune-tellers tell you what you want to happen; witches tell you what’s going to happen whether you want it to or not. Strangely enough, witches tend to be more accurate but less popular.”

“‎"Smrt je kuckala prstima po stolu, proizvodeći zvuk koji uopće ne sliči mišjem stepu, i podarila Morta s još nekoliko sekunda svojeg čvrstog pogleda. Učinilo joj se da dječak ima manje lakte nego kad ga je upoznala, da stoji malo uspravnije i, gle gluposti, znade koristiti riječi poput "iščekivanje". Za sve je kriva ta knjižnica.”

“He'd been an angel once. He hadn't meant to Fall. He'd just hung around with the wrong people.”

“I'VE NEVER BEEN VERY SURE ABOUT WHAT IS RIGHT, said Bill Door. I AM NOT SURE THERE IS SUCH A THING AS RIGHT. OR WRONG. JUST PLACES TO STAND.”

“Was that what it was really like to be alive? The feeling of darkness dragging you forward?How could they live with it? And yet they did, and even seemed to find enjoyment in it, when surely the only sensible course would be to despair. Amazing. To feel you were a tiny living thing, sandwiched between two cliffs of darkness. How could they stand to be alive?”

“The fastest way to travel is to be there already.”

“Are you a hero, actually?”“Um, no. Not as such. Not at all, really. Even less than that, in fact.”

“Do you think there’s anything to eat in this forest?”“Yes,” said the wizard bitterly, “us.”

“It will certainly show what our ancestors would be thinking if they were alive today. People have often speculated about this. Would they approve of modern society, they ask, would they marvel at present-day achievements? And of course this misses a fundamental point. What our ancestors would really be thinking, if they were alive today, is: "Why is it so dark in here?”

“ If you ask 10 nomes to push four will pull and two will say pardon”

“ASTONISHING, said Death. REALLY ASTONISHING. LET ME PUT FORWARD ANOTHER SUGGESTION: THAT YOU ARE NOTHING MORE THAN A LUCKY SPECIES OF APE THAT IS TRYING TO UNDERSTAND THE COMPLEXITIES OF CREATION VIA A LANGUAGE THAT EVOLVED IN ORDER TO TELL ONE ANOTHER WHERE THE RIPE FRUIT WAS.”

“I could use you—if you pass the tests, of course. There are three of them. You have passed the first.""What are the other—" Hrun paused, his lips moved soundlessly and then he hazarded, "two?”

“I would like to apologize to the relatives of the fan who gave me 29 books to sign in Odyssey 7, Manchester. I'm a little twitchy towards the end of a day of signing and did not mean to kill and eat him.”

“Somewhere deep inside his mind, somewhere beyond the event horizon of rationality, the sheer pressure of insanity had hammered his madness into something harder than diamond.”

“He was, he would be the first to admit, a coward, an incompetent, and not even very good at being a failure.”

“Mort wandered hopelessly along the winding streets. Anyone hovering at rooftop heightwould have noticed a certain pattern in the crowds behind him, suggesting a number of men converging nonchalantly on a target, and would rightly have concluded that Mort and his gold had about the same life expectancy as a three-legged hedgehog on a six-lane motorway.”

“You are not apprehensive, are you? I can't detect no trace of fear none whatsoever Roomy cranium all possible videos of all possible outcomes of current situation and envisage.”

“Any ignorant fool can fail to turn someone else into a frog. You have to be clever to refrain from doing it when you know how easy it is.”

“Nothing-to-see is what most of the universe consists of.”

“Raise the stakes! Always push your luck because no one else would push it for you.”

“It was the heart of any scam or fiddle -- keep the punter uncertain, or, if he is certain, make him certain of the wrong thing.”

“Every organization needs at least one person who knows what's going on, and why it's happening, and who's doing it.”

“The people who guard the rainbow don't like those who get in the way of the sun.”

“The only way to get something to turn up when you need it is to need it to turn up.”

“Where's the sense in promising to achive the achievable?”

“I don’t think it's weak to admit you made a mistake. That takes strength, if you ask me.”

“I thought we used to kill rats?" he said, as if he wasn't quite certain anymore."Yes, but you see, sir, this is the future," said Maurice."Is it?" said Mr. Schlummer. "Really? I always wondered when the future was going to happen. Oh, well. Cats talk now, too? Well done! Got to move with the, mm, the...things that move, obviously. Wake me up when they bring the tea in.”

“You saying killing a rat would be murder?" said Raufman."Yes. Of course.""But it's just - ""Talk to the paw, mister, 'cos the whiskers don't want to know!”

“Here's what I suggest," he said. "You pretend that rats can think, and I'll promise to pretend that humans can think, too.”

“Can I ask a question, sir?" said Maurice, as Death turned to go.You May Not Get An Answer."I suppose there isn't a Big Cat in the Sky, is there?"I'm Surprised At You, Maurice. Of Course There Are No Cat Gods. That Would Be Too Much Like...Work.Maurice nodded. One good thing about being a cat, apart from the extra lives, was that the theology was a lot simpler.”

“Please, young sir! Have mercy! If not for me, please think of my dear wife and my four lovely children who'll be without their daddy!""You're not married," said Malicia. "You don't have any children!""I might want some one day!”

“Maurice watched them argue again. Humans, eh? Think they're lords of creation. Not like us cats. We know we are. Ever see a cat feed a human? Case proven.”

“[..]I reckon responsible behaviour is something to get when you grow older. Like varicose veins.”

“Crivens!’‘Oh no, not them,’ said the Queen, throwing up her hands.It wasn’t just the Nac Mac Feegles, but also Wentworth, a strong smell of seaweed, a lot of water and a dead shark. They appeared in mid-air and landed in a heap between Tiffany and the Queen. But a pictsie was always ready for a fight, and they bounced, rolled and came up drawing their swords and shaking sea water out of their hair.‘Oh, ‘tis you, izzut?’ said Rob Anybody, glaring up at the Queen. ‘Face to face wi’ ye at last, ye bloustie ol’ callyack that ye are! Ye canna’ come here, unnerstand? Be off wi’ ye! Are ye goin’ to go quietly?’The Queen stamped heavily on him. When she took her foot away, only the top of his head was visible above the turf.‘Well, are ye?’ he said, pulling himself out as if nothing had happened. ‘I don’t wantae havtae lose my temper wi’ ye! An’ it’s no good sendin’ your pets against us, ‘cos you ken we can take ‘em tae the cleaners!’ He turned to Tiffany, who hadn’t moved. ‘You just leave this tae us, Kelda. Us an’ the Quin, we go way back!”

“Nac Mac Feegle! The Wee Free Men! Nae king! Nae quin! Nae laird! Nae master! We willna' be fooled again!”

“A Duke couldn't have the arse hanging out of his trousers when meeting foreign diplomats. Actually even plain old Sam Vimes never had the arse hanging out of his trousers, either, but no one would have actually started a war if he had.”