If you’re a fan of the undead or just fascinated by zombie lore, you’re in the right place. Zombies have become a staple in pop culture, inspiring quotes that range from chilling to thought-provoking and even humorous. We’ve gathered the top 72 best zombie quotes that capture the spirit of these relentless creatures and the stories they inhabit. Whether you’re looking for inspiration, a laugh, or something to share with fellow fans, this collection has something for every zombie enthusiast.
1. “Often, a school is your best bet-perhaps not for education but certainly for protection from an undead attack.” - Max Brooks
2. “A man. A dead man. A dead man with no arms.” - David Wellington
3. “I will not negotiate with the undead!” - David Wellington
4. “I love zombies. If any monster could Riverdance, it would be zombies.” - Craig Ferguson
5. “You are working up to Mr. Fantastic Fiction levels of Zombie Expert, which is like playing Guitar Hero on some level that actually melts the guitar controller, burning your fingers with searing hot plastic till you scream in pain. Only with words. And zombies.” - Libba Bray
6. “There was something about clowns that was worse than zombies. (Or maybe something that was the same. When you see a zombie, you want to laugh at first. When you see a clown, most people get a little nervous. There's the pallor and the cakey mortician-style makeup, the shuffling and the untidy hair. But clowns were probably malicious, and they moved fast on those little bicycles and in those little crammed cars. Zombies weren't much of anything. They didn't carry musical instruments and they didn't care whether or not you laughed at them. You always knew what zombies wanted.)” - Kelly Link
7. “Whip," Walter echoed. "So there's an iPhone app for fighting zombies. Interesting.” - Amelia Beamer
8. “Zombies are the middle children of the otherworldly family. Vampires are the oldest brother who gets to have a room in the attic, all tripped out with a disco ball and shag carpet. Werewolves are the youngest, the babies, always getting pinched and told they're cute. With all that attention stolen away from the middle child Zombie, no wonder she shuffles off grumbling, "Marsha, Marsha, Marsha.” - Kevin James Breaux
9. “It is a truth universally acknowledged that a zombie in possession of brains must be in want of more brains.” - Seth Grahame-Smith
10. “Zombies can't believe the energy we waste on nonfood pursuits.” - Patton Oswalt
11. “Hey, Ms. P," Tad called, "what's going on?"She let out a slow breath before she answered. "You won't believe this... Brian Murrey tried to eat Scott Morgan."Nick's eyes widened at the unexpected explanation. Had he heard that right?” - Sherrilyn Kenyon
12. “All right, you deadly little ghostlings,” I muttered. “Mama says go back to bed! - Cat” - Jeaniene Frost
13. “Beth from accountingis just sitting in her careating spaghetti.” - Ryan Mecum
14. “Isn't it wonderful when people do that, when you put all your faith in their being selfish and self -centered and not giving a damn and it turns out, all that time, you were wrong?” - Joan Frances Turner
15. “The whole right side of his face was smashed in, concave forehead and crushed cheekbone and one eye bugging precariously from a broken socket. He was purplish-black, and dirty white: Maggots seethed from every pore and crawled across him in excited wriggly piles, blowflies waving and blooming and wilting, the bits of bone they'd scraped clean glinting like tiny mosaic tiles. Scraps of jeans and a leather jacket clung to the sticky seething mess of his flesh. He was big, big shouldered, a good foot taller; chit-chitter, he went, even standing still.” - Joan Frances Turner
16. “Something coming back from the dead was almost always bad news. Movies taught me that. For every one Jesus you get a million zombies.” - David Wong
17. “She sticks to the rules, because it's all she's got. It's like her feelings dried up and they were replaced with a pile of useless laws. Like my appendix. Don't know what I need it for, but it's still there.” - Monica Valentinelli
18. “The monkey didn't help matters any. He was sitting on top of the microbus, just watching the undead plunge to their end. His face appeared so serene, so intelligent, as if he truly understood the situation. I almost wanted him to turn to me and say, 'This is the turning point of the war! We've finally stopped them! We're finally safe!' But instead his little penis popped out and he peed in my face.” - Max Brooks
19. “I said to him, "State your business, mortal!" There was no need for me to call him "mortal" or to speak like a sixteenth-century knight. It just sounded cool.” - alan goldsher
20. “Then he said in his most excellent Mick impression, "Your powers are useless against Ninja Lords, O great zombie hunter! Surrender or feel the sting of the shuriken!” - alan goldsher
21. “My friend "M" says the irony of being a zombie is that everything is funny, but you can't smile, because your lips have rotted off.” - Isaac Marion
22. “You know, surprisingly, they don't sell a lot of brains in the local 24-hour grocery store around the corner from my house.” - Rusty Fischer
23. “This was good, except that now I had two crazed, burning zombies standing between me and the exit, plus another one that wasn’t on fire. I had not thought this plan through at all.” - Amanda Hocking
24. “Be nice to her,” I muttered under my breath. “She’s my sister; she got sick. She lost her kid. For all I know, she may have eaten her.” - Joan Frances Turner
25. “I'm watching her talk. Watching her jaw move and collecting her words one by one as they spill from her lips. I don't deserve them. Her warm memories. I'd like to paint them over the bare plaster walls of my soul, but everything I paint seems to peel.” - Isaac Marion
26. “I totally don't know what to do." He got up and started pacing. "Am I supposed to get you a present? Or maybe a card. I'm completely lost.” - David Lubar
27. “Little old laidesspeed away in their wheel chairs,frightened meals on wheels.” - Ryan Mecum
28. “Not all the magic of earth is benevolent.” - Alden Bell
29. “What is it like.... what is it like to be dead?' Evan looked at him with his dull, unblinking blue eyes, ' I don't know, what is it like...... to be alive?” - Daniel Waters
30. “Alice is fictional. This isn't.” - Jess C. Scott
31. “To me, the best zombie movies aren’t the splatter fests of gore and violence with goofy characters and tongue in cheek antics. Good zombie movies show us how messed up we are, they make us question our station in society… and our society’s station in the world. They show us gore and violence and all that cool stuff too… but there’s always an undercurrent of social commentary and thoughtfulness.” - Robert Kirkman
32. “I just find it interesting that kids apparently used to cry when Bambi's mother died. George and I both held our breaths, and then cheered when she didn't reanimate and try to eat her son.” - Mira Grant
33. “...they come to us, these restless dead,Shrouds woven from the words of men,With trumpets sounding overhead(The walls of hope have grown so thinAnd all our vaunted innocenceHas withered in this endless frost)That promise little recompenseFor all we risk, for all we've lost...” - Mira Grant
34. “Excuse me if I feel skeptical,' I said. 'Coach's foot fell off. How exactly do you propose to cure that? Superglue?” - Carrie Harris
35. “That puke was the most wonderful thing I'd ever seen. It was green and a little red. Technicolor, really, the color puke is supposed to be. It definitely wasn't black, and it didn't smell like toasty poop. This was a good sign.” - Carrie Harris
36. “But no matter what happens to the surviving humans, there will always be the walking dead.” - Max Brooks
37. “Each time a girl approached the table, Mortimer would smile. Like this: And each time the girl would shriek and run away.” - Kelly DiPucchio
38. “When Jesus said “Whoever eats my flesh & drinks my blood has eternal life” John 6:54 He was CLEARLY talking to Zombies & Vampires” - Pablo
39. “It is meant to be survival of the fittest, not survival of the most floral.” - Stephen Herfst
40. “In fact, since the accident, Mom doesn't love anyone. She is marble. Beautiful. Frigid. Easily stained by her family. What's left of us anyway. We are corpses.At first, we sought rebirth. But resurrection devoid of her love has made us zombies. We get up every morning, skip breakfast, hurry off to work or school. For in those other places, we are more at home.And sometimes we stagger beneath the weight of grief, the immensity of aloneness.” - Ellen Hopkins
41. “If you want to go foraging into the wilds of Canada without proper gear, you deserve what you get, even if that happens to include being attacked by an undead moose.” - Mira Grant
42. “My story ended where so many stories have ended since the Rising: with a man—in this case, my adoptive brother and best friend, Shaun—holding a gun to the base of my skull as the virus in my blood betrayed me, transforming me from a thinking human being into something better suited to a horror movie.” - Mira Grant
43. “I'd like to sit down with him and pick his brain, just a tiny bite somewhere in the frontal lobe to get a taste of his thoughts" -Warm Bodies” - Isaac Marion
44. “The conversation limped along this line of thought much like a zombie: lifeless and mindless and making a jelly of whatever healthy brains were within its reach.” - Steve Hockensmith
45. “Fuathan don’t come out until after dark. Sunlight kills them.’‘Like vampires?’‘Kind of. Very mean, sub-aquatic vampires who don’t need to drink your blood, but might do it anyway, just for fun.” - Somerset McCoy
46. “He's a ghost, not a carnival magician.-Benny Imura” - Jonathan Maberry
47. “And to those who would choose the safety of inaction over the danger of taking a stand, I have this to say:You bloody cowards. May you have the world that you deserve.” - Mira Grant
48. “I’d once again see that bob of blonde hair back on my pillow, that pink hot smile beaming toward me as I heroically win her heart in some kind of Count of Monte Cristo or Great Gatsby-esque gesture… you know minus the long imprisonment or swimming pool death!” - Tom Conrad
49. “He grumbles incoherently, opens the window a fraction and continues to smoke away. It’s like every time Sidney Drake enters a new location he has to readjust the atmosphere, akin to one of those sci-fi shows where they oxygenate the planet, but for my dad it’s in a suffocating reverse. He replaces the clean wholesome air with a non-stop puff of toxic poison.” - Tom Conrad
50. “The truth was, neither the Central Intelligence Agency nor any of the other official and unofficial U.S. intelligence organizations have ever been some kind of all-seeing, all-knowing, global illuminati. For starters, we never hand that kind of funding.” - Max Brooks
51. “You and I are victims of the same disease. We're fighting the same war, just different battles in different theaters, and it's way too late for me to hate you for anything, because we're the same damn thing. My soul, your conscience, whatever's left of me woven into whatever's left of you, all tangled up and conjoined. We're in this together, corpse.” - Isaac Marion
52. “Who would want to be the prey in a world full of hunters?” - Alexia Purdy
53. “Fucking GUNS are fucking AWESOME and when you SHOOT them at SHIT, they fucking KILL it!” - Etienne Guerin DeForest
54. “The abundance of small things, it'll bury you.” - Alden Bell
55. “We never surrendered. We always kept in our hearts the most noble, beautiful feeling that sets human beings apart: hope.” - Manel Loureiro
56. “Who knew death could lead to an eating disorder?” - Corey Redekop
57. “Fresh is best.” - Die Booth
58. “I don't like zombie movies, they're just plain silly.” - Wayne Gerard Trotman
59. “Run, sweetheart, run.” - Rae Hachton
60. “When approaching a prospective human, first ask them what their name is. * If it replies "Brains," blow its fucking head off. * If it replies "Brian," ask it again, as you may have encountered a zombie with a speech impediment, or a zombie that was mildly retarded in life. * Keep in mind that it is entirely possible that you did encounter a human named "Brian.” - Etienne Guerin DeForest
61. “Hippos are the very definition of Disney cute. There is no way you could look at a big, fat, squishy, huggable hippo and not think, "Id she could talk like a human, she would sound just like Jada Pinkett Smith and be oh so sassy." You would totally name her Sassy-baskets, and she would be your tutu-wearing, ballet-dancing, strut-walking pal for life. Just you and Sassy-baskets against the world!” - Cracked.com
62. “Zombies are the liberal nightmare. Here you have the masses, whom you would love to love, appearing at your front door with their faces falling off; and you’re trying to be as humane as you possibly can, but they are, after all, eating the cat. And the fear of mass activity, of mindlessness on a national scale, underlies my fear of zombies.” - Clive Barker
63. “People could say a lot of negative things about the apocalypse, but there was no arguing the air quality in Los Angeles had really improved.” - Peter Clines
64. “What did the zombie say to the whore? Keep the tip!” - Diana Rowland
65. “I continued toward Atlanta with a Merle Haggard C.D. playing on the stereo. They weren't great hosts, but those guys in The Ted Kaczynski Fan Club had great taste in music. It was all classic country music- none of that sissy, boy-band country that they played on the radio all the time. I drove down the road while Merle preferred to just stay where he was and drink.” - Ian McClellan
66. “He could wear hats. He could wear an assortment of hats of different shapes and styles. Boater hats, cowboy hats, bowler hats. The list went on. Pork-pie hats, bucket hats, trillbies and panamas. Top hats, straw hats, trapper hats. Wide brim narrow brim, stingy brim. He could wear a fez. Fezzes were cool. Hadn't someone once said that fezzes were cool? He was pretty aur ether had. And they were. They were cool.” - Derek Landy
67. “Yeah, okay. You're right. I was having dinner with Zombie Carl the other night. You know, steak, rare, and a bottle of vintage type A. He told me all his secrets, but too bad for you I promised him I wouldn't tell. In exchange I asked him to gather his best undead buddies and stalk me through my friend's yard. And oh, yeah, it was totally fine if they wanted to use me as an all-night-dinner buffet, because having organs is SO last year.” - Gena Showalter
68. “I’m alive; I’m not gonna try eating your ass, okay? Don’t shoot!” “What… Eat my ASS?”“Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that.” - Etienne Guerin DeForest
69. “We're all guilty of saying insincere things at one point or another, if only just to make the moment not totally suck as much as it truly does.” - Jen Naumann
70. “It saddened me that sometimes shopping was far more perilous than dealing with zombies and vampires.” - Anton Strout
71. “I wish I could break this window. Step through it. But I can't break this window. I can't even find some less dramatic way to die inside of this school, like hanging myself or slitting my wrists, because what would they do with my body? It might put everyone at risk. I won't let myself do that.I'm not selfish like Lily.I hate her. I hate her so much my heart tries to crawl out of my throat but it gets stuck there and beats crazily in the too narrow space. I bring my hands to my neck and try to massage it back down. I pres so heard against the skin, my eyes sting, and then I'm hurrying back down the stairs, back to the first floor. I think of Trace running laps, something he can control.” - Courtney Summers
72. “I could not be a zombie. They had no thoughts. Their brains were gruel. They said little beyond "Brrr!" unable, even, to articulate completely what they sought."Brains,"I said distinctly. "And I feel no burning urge to partake of any." Forsooth, the idea sent a wave of nausea through me. Therefore I was not a zombie.” - Lori Handeland
