“God doesn't do notes, either. Did Jesus Christ say, "Can I be excused the Crucifixion?" No!”

“One recipe for happiness is to have to sense of entitlement.' To this she added a star and noted at the bottom of the page: 'This is not a lesson I have ever been in a position to learn.”

“IRWIN: At the time of the Reformation there were fourteen foreskins of Christ preserved, but it was thought that the church of St John Lateran in Rome had the authentic prepuce.DAKIN: Don't think we're shocked by your mention of the word 'foreskin', sir.CROWTHER: No, sir. Some of us even have them.LOCKWOOD: Not Posner, though, sir. Posner's like, you know, Jewish.It's one of several things Posner doesn't have. (Posner mouths 'fuck off.')”

“HEADMASTER: I was a geographer. I went to Hull.IRWIN: Oh. Larkin.HEADMASTER: Everybody says that. 'Hull? Oh, Larkin.' I don't know about the poetry...as I say, I was a geographer...but as a librarian he was pitiless. The Himmler of the Accessions Desk. And now, we're told, women in droves. Art. They get away with murder.”

“[talking about the Holocaust]'But to put something in context is a step towards saying it can be understood and that it can be explained. And if it can be explained that it can be explained away.''But this is History. Distance yourselves. Our perspective on the past alters. Looking back, immediately in front of us is dead ground. We don't see it, and because we don't see it this means that there is no period so remote as the recent past. And one of the historian's jobs is to anticipate what our perspective of that period will be... even on the Holocaust.”

“I have to seem like a human being all the time, but I seldom have to be one. I have people to do that for me.”

“How do I define history? It's just one fucking thing after another”