“I shot up out of my chair. “Change of plans. Finish your drink so we can go.”Jay responded flatly, “Go where exactly?”“I’m not sure but we’ll know it when we see it.”He looked at his glass and back to me. “Why bother?”I looked him the eye, seeing pain there and forcing myself not to flinch from it. “Because pity parties suck” I started walking toward the exit and over my shoulder asked “You coming?”He downed the rest of his drink and followed me out the door.”

“Tell me something,” he said in a low voice.“Anything,” I answered.“What’s it like to have every breath count?”I sat up and braced myself on my hand. “I’m not following what you mean,” I answered.Jess pulled himself up and propped his hands behind him. He looked out at the water as if he were seeing something from his past. “To live life as if it’s your last breath. To know that any minute could be the final one and that you have to make the most of what’s given to you. To know not everything is forever.”I could see the defined muscles in his arm, but what caught my attention the most was the bottom half of the symbol just under the sleeve of his shirt. Like before, I reached my finger and traced the snake resting on the stem. Sliding his sleeve higher, I followed upward toward the pedals of the black rose.“It bothers you, doesn’t it? The fact that you’re constantly reminded of...” I couldn’t finish what I wanted to say. I didn’t want to hurt him.He looked over his shoulder, and I stopped what I was doing to look up at him. “Yeah, it bothers me. But you know what bothers me even more? You’re not like me. You can take a final breath.”

“It was just regular growing up, of course, the kind everyone does - but it still hurt him, I know, like the memory I have of the time he dropped me off at the train station when I was going back to Chicago. I could see him through the window of the train, but he couldn't see me through the tinted glass. I waved, trying to get his attention as he walked up and down the platform trying to figure out where I was sitting. From up in the train, he looked so small. If he'd seen me, he would have smiled and waved, but he didn't know I could see him, and the sadness on his face was exposed to me then. He looked lost. He stood there on the platform a long time, even after my train started pulling away, still trying to catch a glimpse of me waving back.”

“Can we go back to the part where you're in love with me?""No, because I'm not anymore. I've come to my senses.""That's a damn shame, that is. You'll have to wait here a minute. There's something I need from inside.""I'll not stand out here. I'm going home.""I'll only come after you, Brenna," he called over his shoulder as he walked to the door.”

“I let my head fall forward into his shoulder, breathing in his scent. "Now what do we do?"He's quiet for a while and I finally lean back to look him in the eyes. He appears conflicted by something and then he sets me down on the ground, lacing his fingers through mine."Should we see where the wind takes us?" he asks.I stare at my hand in his and then look up at him. "That sounds good to me.”

“What exactly is your job here?’ ‘So that’s what you’ve dragged yourself out here to ask. See now I’m disappointed, you could have at least come out in that state just because you wanted to see me,’ he said with a smirk.‘How do you know that's not another reason?’‘I don't!’ he said, walking towards me. He stopped a few inches in front of me and looked deep into my eyes, while leaning on the car. I swallowed hard.”