“I hope the Vandals had thorns in their sandals”

“On the Vanity of Earthly GreatnessThe tusks which clashed in mighty brawlsOf mastodons, are billiard balls.The sword of Charlemagne the JustIs Ferric Oxide, known as rust.The grizzly bear, whose potent hug,Was feared by all, is now a rug.Great Caesar's bust is on the shelf,And I don't feel so well myself.”

“Don't tell your friends about your indigestions: "How are you!" is a greeting, not a question.”

“In life as in football, fall forward when you fall.”

“No rose without a thorn but many a thorn without a rose.”

“No rose without a thorn. Yes, but many a thorn without a rose.”

“I found I could extinguish all human hope from my soul.”