“My own theory is that the spectacle of the homeless may be necessary to keep the rest of us on the straight and narrow...”

“My own attitude to the innumerable injustices of life has always been a philosophical one, especially when they have tended to operate in my favour.”

“It is just a lonely certainty that we are right and everybody else wrong, which makes it worthwhile for us busy-bodies to go on making a nuisance of ourselves. Our job is to keep both the simple Philistine and the greedy rich in their places, to prevent them, in their stupidity and avarice, from destroying everything that is left.”

“There are countless horrible things happening all over the world and horrible people prospering, but we must never allow them to disturb our equanimity or deflect us from our sacred duty to sabotage and annoy them whenever possible.”

“When Glenda Jackson reveals that she has never been in a relationship with a man in which he hasn't raised his fists to her, I don't know whether this tells us more about the contemporary male or about Glenda Jackson.”

“...judicial execution can never cancel or remove the atrocity it seeks to punish: it can only add a second atrocity to the original one.”

“The main objection to killing people as a punishment...is that killing people is wrong”