“It's a wonder, given your prowess with these delicious women, that there aren't dozens of little Bonapartes running around. Tell me, how do you account for that?”

“Take it from me, whenever you see a bunch of buggers puttering around talking about truth and beauty and the best way of attacking Ethics, you can bet your sandals it's all because dozens of other poor buggers are doing all the real work around the place.”

“You got me. As soon as I saw your prowess with the floor buffer, I was yours.”

“It's a little weird that they keep walking around sniffing things. Think I'll do that eventually?""I have no idea. At least they aren't chewing on the furniture.”

“Do they ever ask pirates to come and speak to you at your school's career day?''No,' admitted Derek. 'They usually just have accountants come and tell us how accountancy is really exciting.''They let people come and lie to you?' asked Nanny Piggins. 'Your headmaster is a very immoral man.”

“If you don't like men who physically abuse women, stop telling your son it's okay to hit a little girl if she's bothering him.”