“My dad was a magician too. Got in his car and disappeared.”
“I got up and hugged first his dad and then his mom, who held on to me too tight, like Gus used to, squeezing my shoulder blades.”
“My dad and my brother and my cousins carry him out to the car of the person who is least angry at him.”
“My dad used to say that living with regrets was like driving a car that only moved in reverse.”
“Cats are magicians. They can make my erections disappear. All they have to do is jump in my lap while I’m masturbating. Damn! This is the second time today I’ve had to pause Golden Girls!”
“I never got along with my dad. Kids used to come up to me and say, "My dad can beat up your dad." I'd say Yeah? When?”