“Growl, you live in a slime lair and maintain an identity as the mysterious overlord of an undersea city, you command a fleet of meat dreadnaughts with crews of humanoid whale people, and you're currently reclining in a pulsating mass of gelatinous goo that looks like it escaped from hell's own Jell-O mold--so excuse the fuck out of me if I question your motives.”

Christopher Moore

Christopher Moore - “Growl, you live in a slime lair and...” 1

Similar quotes

“Hell, your kid is fucking my wife, and your wife is fucking me. [...]Not that she's any good, Zane said, looking at Georgia, and when she made a little cry of protest, he added, Hell Georgia, even Jell-O moves when you eat it.”

Jennifer Crusie
Read more

“Don't tell me about worth," Nita said. "My father commands fleets.""The wealthy measure everything with the weight of their money." Tool leaned close. "Sadna once risked herself and the rest of her crew to help me escape from an oil fire... Your father commands fleets. And thousands of half-men, I am sure. But would he risk himself to save a single one?”

Paolo Bacigalupi
Read more

“Guys like you can't escape the city. Hell, you a got a blood contract with this place. You're married to the old girl.”

Mickey Spillane
Read more

“I have a flamthrower. (Zarek)You have a what? (Astrid)It pays to be prepared. (Zarek)Well. Those are nice for toasting marshmallows, but they’ll only make Thanatos mad. Regular fire won’t hurt him. I have this really neat gelatinous goo that comes out with my fire and it squirts my victims so that it don’t come off. Wanna see it? (Simi)No! (Zarek/Astrid)No? I don’t like that word. (Simi)We love you, Simi. We’re just scared of your goo. (Astrid)Oh, that I understand. Okay, you can live. (Simi)”

Sherrilyn Kenyon
Read more

“The Kappamaki, a whaling research ship, was currently researching the question: How many whales can you catch in one week?”

Terry Pratchett
Read more