“What has started you on this?" I asked. "We were talking about the holidays." "Los Angeles is not a safe place for a young woman alone. I feel it in my bones.""That's your arthritis, Aunt Sadie. Do you want me to get a gun? I'd probably shoot myself in the foot.""I'd rather you got married again.""That might be worse than shooting myself in the foot.”

“You can hear my dreams? God, you must never get any quiet. I'd be shooting myself in the head if I were you.”

“Once you got started, all you had to do was keep placing one foot in front of the other, no matter how happy or sad you were. I'd taken that first step because I'd wanted to look better. I'd wanted my clothes to fit. But it hadn't taken me long to figure out that the biggest benefit was less about vanity than it was about sanity. Walking always helped.”

“I conceal myself behind cynicism because it’s safe. Camouflage is more protective than body armor. Why do you think the Department of Defense contacted me to design a gun that shoots insults?”

“Ahoy there, Lord Pegleg!" cried the Fool. "Why are you hopping on one foot?""And what would you have do on one foot?" the man asked. "Pirouette? Besides, if I were to untie my other foot I would move too fast for anyone to see me. Why, I would trip over the equator in one stride.""That's pretty quick," the Fool said."If you think that's quick," the man replied, "you should have seen me before the old arthritis set in.”

“How could you be nervous about asking me to marry you, Bones? I'd die for you. Why wouldn't I want to live for you as well?”