“It was one of those pictures that children are supposed to like but don't. Full of endearing little animals doing endearing things, you know?”

“A learning experience is one of those things that says, 'You know that thing you just did? Don't do that.”

“You know what a learning experience is? A learning experience is one of those things that says, "You know that thing you just did? Don't do that.”

“You come to me for advice, but you can't cope with anything you don't recognize. Hmmm. So we'll have to tell you something you already know but make it sound like news, eh Well, business as usual , I suppose.”

“For Children: You will need to know the difference between Friday and a fried egg. It's quite a simple difference, but an important one. Friday comes at the end of the week, whereas a fried egg comes out of a chicken. Like most things, of course, it isn't quite that simple. The fried egg isn't properly a fried egg until it's been put in a frying pan and fried. This is something you wouldn't do to a Friday, of course, though you might do it on a Friday. You can also fry eggs on a Thursday, if you like, or on a cooker. It's all rather complicated, but it makes a kind of sense if you think about it for a while.”

“No private detective looks like a private detective. That's one of the first rules of private detection.""But if no private detective looks like a private detective, how does a private detective know what it is he's supposed not to look like? Seems to me there's a problem there.”

“Don't believe anything you read on the net. Except this. Well, including this, I suppose.”