“What are Americans still buying? Big Macs,Campbell's soup,Hershey's chocolate and Spam--the four food groups of the apocalypse.”

“The most wonderful street in the universe is Broadway. It is a world within itself. High and low, rich and poor, pass along at a rate peculiar to New York, and positively bewildering to a stranger.”

“I was struck by how life moved so fast, almost cruelly, on Broadway. Fiorello! had fled the Broadhurst to make way for Sail Away, as if it had never existed. I studied each such metamorphosis with contradictory emotions of excitement and loss. With their new marquees and posters and glass-encased displays of fresh photos, the theaters promised a teeming bounty of surprises. But there remained not a shred of their previous tenants, who were gone forever and mourned by no one, perhaps, except me. When shows left the National, I knew they were going on to Broadway or at least to another town on the road. Where did the plays that left New York go?”

“There are four basic food groups: plain chocolate, milk chocolate, dark chocolate, and white chocolate.”

“God: Check out this human I designed.Angel: Wow, that looks pretty incredible. How does it work?God: It's pretty complicated. Point to something and I'll tell you what it does.Angel: Okay. What are these?God: Teeth. They're for chewing up food.Angel: How come there are so many of them?God: I threw in, like, three or four extra. If they don't like them, they can pll them out somehow, I guess.Angel: What about this weird bag thing?God: That's the appendix.Angel: What does it do?God: It explodes.Angel: Really? That's all?God: Pretty much.Angel: What causes that to happen?God: It just happens randomly. Like you'll just be walking down the street or driving a car and boom.Angel: Geez...that's terrifying. Does it kill the person?God: (shrugs) Sometimes.”

“Fine! Whatever! Just be careful, my hands are still slippery with your blood.”

“Christianity is not about building an absolutely secure little niche in the world where you can live with your perfect little wife and your perfect little children in your beautiful little house where you have no gays or minority groups anywhere near you. Christianity is about learning to love like Jesus loved and Jesus loved the poor and Jesus loved the broken.”