“I was born when the Dead Sea was still sick.”
“I was alive when the Dead Sea was just a lake that was feeling a little poorly.”
“I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead.”
“The only way I won't be re-elected is if I were found in bed with a dead girl or a live boy.”
“It is a curious fact, but nobody ever is sea-sick - on land. At sea, you come across plenty of people very bad indeed, whole boat-loads of them; but I never met a man yet, on land, who had ever known at all what it was to be sea-sick. Where the thousands upon thousands of bad sailors that swarm in every ship hide themselves when they are on land is a mystery.”