“Would you like to work here with me?We have no clients and the pay is shit.”
“Are you sure you know where you're going?" Andrea frowned."Would you like me to pull over and ask that bamboo for directions?""I don't know, do you think it will answer?"We peered at the bamboo."I think it looks suspicious," Andrea said."Maybe there is a heffalump hiding in it."Andrea stared at me."You know, heffalump? From Pooh Bear?""Where do you even get this shit?”
“I was so happy to be out of there. “Barabas, if you weren’t batting for the other team, I’d marry you.”He grinned. “If I weren’t batting for the other team, I would accept your proposal." You had me at ‘No comment.’ If all my clients were this smart, my life would be much easier. Much, much easier.”
“Do you like my working persona?" Saiman asked softly. "An aesthetically pleasing combination of intelligence and elegance, wouldn't you say?"Aren't we pleased with ourselves. "Are you Chinese, Japanese, half-white? I can't tell, your features are neither here nor there.""I'm inscrutable, mysterious and intellectual."He forgot conceited. "Did you have any trouble getting that ego through the door?"Saiman didn't even blink. "Not in the least.”
“You know what I like about you? You have no sense. You sit here in my house, you can barely hold a spoon, and you're telling me 'no'. You'd pull on Death's whiskers if you could reach them.”
“You'll lose.""What makes you so sure?""You have no discipline. All you do is tear down shit down. My father is a bastard, but at least he builds things. You turn cities into smoking ruins and blunder about like some hyper child, smashing anything you see. And then you sit here and wonder, 'Why did all of my children turn out to be violet idiots? It's a mystery of nature,'.”
“You want me to go back into that house protected by a magic sticky note?”“Don’t even start,” I told him. “It’s working. If it weren’t working, you couldn’t drag me into that place.”“What did you write on here? ‘Don’t die’?”“No, I wrote, ‘Don’t be an a-hole!’” I headed for the house.“On yours or mine?”“On yours.”“Well, in that case, your magic isn’t working. I’m still an asshole.”