“If she wasn't your grandmother I'd shoot her."Ranger”

“My grandmother is a little Cuban woman who cooks all day and speaks Spanish. Your grandmother watches pay-per-view porn.""She used to watch the Weather Channel, but she said there wasn't enough action."-Ranger and Stephanie”

“I'd spent a night with Ranger a while ago, and I knew what happened when he was encouraged. Ranger knew how to make a woman want him. Ranger was magic.”

“If I didn't know better, I'd think you were trying to get me drunk," I said to Ranger. "Not drunk," Ranger said. "Just relaxed and naked.”

“Ranger is an unusual name," she managed. "Is it a nickname?"It's a street name," Ranger said. "I was a Ranger in the army."I heard about them Rangers on TV," Grandma said. "I heard they get dogs pregnant."My father's mouth dropped open and a piece of ham fell out.My mother froze, her fork poised in midair.That's sort of a joke," I told Grandma. "Rangers don't get dogs pregnant in real life."I looked at Ranger for corroboration and got another smile.”

“One of us should stop her," Ranger said to Morelli, his eyes fixed on me."Not going to be me," Morelli said. "Have you ever tried to stop her from doing something she wanted to do?""Haven't had much success at it," Ranger said.Morelli rocked on his heels. "One thing I've learned about Stephanie over the years, she's not good at taking orders.""Has authority issues," Ranger said."And if you piss her off, she'll get even. She ran me over with her father's Buick once and broke my leg."That got a small smile out of Ranger."Nice to see you boys bonding," I said.”

“He [Ranger] stopped in front of my parents' house, and we both looked to the door. My mother and my grandmother were standing there, watching us."I'm not sure I feel comfortable about the way your grandma looks at me," Ranger said.[Stephanie] "She wants to see you naked.""I wish you hadn't told me that, babe.""Everyone I know wants to see you naked.""And you?""Never crossed my mind." I held my breath when I said it, and I hoped God wouldn't stike me down dead for lying.”