“Don’t let your inability to see get in the way of your vision.”

“Work hard or don’t work hard, either way your hair will turn gray. I should let you be alone while you die, slowly.”

“18 rules for not getting caught. 1-17: don’t tell anybody. #18: not even your clone.”

“Surrealist Tip # 7: Sleep through numbers 1-6. Write down your dreams while you sleep, sleep as fast as you can, but try not to get a ticket—and don’t let the honking of other drivers wake you up.”

“Your writing can be chosen by one publisher and hated by all readers, or it can be rejected by one publisher and loved by all readers. Most of the time it’s somewhere in between, but either way, don’t let rejection stop you from being hated.”

“A brick could be used to balance work and play. Just place the brick on the top of your head, and don’t let it drop. This will ensure you don’t play too hard—or work too hard.
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“Don’t tell me your name. If you don’t tell me your name, I can’t hurt your feelings by forgetting it.”