“Loneliness is the unloneliest feeling in the world, as everyone has experienced it.”

“The difference between you and everyone else, is everyone else. And that’s a lot, so you should feel special.”

“Everybody who is 100 was at one time 25. But not everybody who is 25 will live to see 100. Likewise, everyone who has a big nose at onetime had a small nose. However, not everyone with a small nose also has a small penis.”

“Everything I’ve ever done, ever thought, ever experienced, and ever felt, has led me up to this moment in my life. And after accumulating and culminating it, all I can say is, “Ahhhhh!”

“Everyone in the world ages at exactly the same rate and time. We’re all getting older in unison.”

“Everyone owns a piece of democracy. Actually, I own two pieces, and each one has a nipple.”

“There should always be one more cat than person, so everyone has one to pet, and I have two to myself.”