“What are memories if they are so painful?”

“There is no pain so great as the memory of joy in present grief.”

“...spiritual or emotional pain doesn't become a memory so much as a bruise ...”

“But pain may be a gift to us. Remember, after all, that pain is one of the ways we register in memory the things that vanish, that are taken away. We fix them in our minds forever by yearning, by pain, by crying out. Pain, the pain that seems unbearable at the time, is memory's first imprinting step, the cornerstone of the temple we erect inside us in memory of the dead. Pain is part of memory, and memory is a God-given gift.”

“The memory was so painful that tears came into my eyes, and a pang of grief tore through my body.”

“A person's memories and their actual experiences are surprisingly different. Sometimes the gap between them causes pain. But the memories that make the biggest impression are always changing. So it's okay.”