“My grandma always said that God made libraries so that people didn't have any excuse to be stupid.”

“We were having the best time working together, too, except when he'd make a mistake on an order and I'd have to be an advocate for my customer. I always mentioned it sweetly."You didn't say hold the bacon, Hope.""Barverman, I said it twice.""You must have said it to someone else.""I said it to you."Clang."Don't clang pots at me.”

“Like my grandmother always said, 'you never know the blessings that come from suffering.”

“I nearly tripped over Stieglitz, my dog, a forty-pound black-and-white keeshond (pronounced caze-hawnd) furball. He lunged at me with unbridled glee because the mere sight of my presence always made his day. It's important to have a dog. Dogs love unconditionally. (Thwonk)”

“If you can't find an answer at the mall or the library, what does that say about the world?”

“I hope you'll have the kind of life where what you stand for is so important that it makes some people outright hostile. You won't know how strong your beliefs really are until you have to defend them.”

“People are so cheap. Everyone wants quality, no one wants to pay for it. Here's the suburban dream-- to hire great workers who are such meek morons that they don't have the guts to ask for a living wage.”