“Well, but you can eat Grandma's cookies. They're not bad for you. They were made by Grandma. Grandma wouldn't hurt you.”

“I'll drive like my grandma. I'll drive like your grandma.""You wouldn't say that if you knew my gramma.”

“Everyone gets so worried about the people who are still living when the people who are really hurting are the dead ones. People like Grandma and Graham.They don’t exist anymore.There is nothing worse than that”

“Grandma Redbird: Honey, you have to move past this.Zoey: How Grandma?Grandma Redbird: By living the life she'd be proud of you for living.”

“If drunk were cookies, I'd be Famous Amos”

“You can imagine another well— but never quite perfectly, you know?”

“Lucky Charms are like the vampires of breakfast cereal. They're magical, they're delicious, they're a little bit dangerous and bad for you. They initially make you feel great, but then over time you realize that maybe your relationship with Lucky Charms is just a little bit unhealthy and you start to think, 'Maybe I don't want to be in a long-term relationship with a breakfast cereal that tastes delicious but damages my health.' But then the Lucky Charms gets all stalker on you and for some reason you kind of like that. It makes you feel special. So yeah, you spend your life with Lucky Charms. That's awesome. That's a great way to... get diabetes.”