“I've always wanted the IQ of a rock. No, wait. That would be an insult to the rock.”

“Scott Waldron.' 'What?' Robbie's lip curled in a glimace of disgust. 'The jockstrap? Why, does he need you to teach him how to read?' I scowled at him. 'Just because he's captain of the football team doesn't mean you can be a jerk. Or are you jealous?' 'Oh, of course, that's it,' Robbie said with a sneer. 'I've always wanted the IQ of a rock. No, wait. That would be an insult to the rock...”

“Tie rock to tail and throw kitty inlake. Watch kitty sink, ha!”

“I glared at Grimalkin, calmly washing his paws on a nearby rock. "That's just fabulous. And you expect us to kill that things? It's the size of Walmart.”

“How is Oberon these days? Still being henpecked by that basilisk of a wife?""Don't insult the basilisk...”

“So, we're at war. Perfect. Shall we save time and kill each other now, or did you want to wait until later?"-Puck”

“Insult her again, and I will cut you into so many pieces they'll never find them all.”