“Instead I sounded like a little girl on her first day of kindergarten. My name is Bee, and I like coloring and horsies.”

“On my first day of kindergarten, I bit a kid. Hard. In my defense, he deserved it.”

“On my first day of kindergarten:"You thought it was hard? If kindergarten is busting your ass, I got some bad news for you about the rest of life.”

“Why don’t I have a cool name like that. Instead of Lucifer and Beelzebub. I mean, seriously, Beelzebub? It sounds like the name of a brothel or a low life bar. Why can’t I be Lu Von Cipher? Sounds good, right?”

“instead i head to the computer and it's like i turn into a little girl who's just seen her first rainbow. i get all giddy and nervous and hopeful and despairing and i tell myself not to look obsessively at my buddy list, but it might as well be projected onto the insides of my eyelids. at 8:05 his name pops up, and i start to count. i only get to twelve before his IM pops up.”

“In the future, it’ll be my child, but it will be my child’s life, so I must name it not for me, but for it. I like how that sounds. I think I’ll call it “It.” Boy or girl, It is perfect.
”