“If we’re not going to get married, we need to break up. So…shit or get off the pot,honey.”“That was beautiful,” murmured Father Bruce as he opened a menu.”

“You want to go to the movies tomorrow night?” he asked, and Posey was so shocked she actually choked.“What?” she managed.“The movies? Tomorrow?”“Um…I, uh…um…what movie?”He narrowed his eyes just a little, and Posey’s nether parts gave a long, happy squeeze. Get his clothes off, those parts advised. We’re lonely.”

“Dearly beloved," Father Bruce began, "we are gathered here to witness the union of Nick and Harper as they pledge their love an devotion to each other for what we hope is the last time, because I don't know about you people, but I don't think any of us should have to go through this again.”

“So you can’t marry Harry, Mom! Not if you still love Daddy!” I sound like a ten-year-old, but I can’t help it. Buttercup comes over to me and puts her head on my lap.“Love gets used up, Chastity,” Mom says gently, reaching up to smooth my hair. “If it’s not returned, it gets used up.”

“Love gets used up, Chastity. If it's not returned, it gets used up.”

“Quiet down! You're supposed to be dead!" snapped a passing Union soldier."This is a private conversation," Margaret snapped back."This is a battle," he hissed."No, honey, this is called pretending. I hate to break it to you, but we're not really in the Civil War. If you'd like to feel a bit more authentic, I'd be happy to stick this bayonet up your ass.”

“I stand up, trying to shake myself mentally. Get over him, Maggie, I instruct myself. I need to stop. I really do. I want to. I’m going to. I sound like a drug addict. Perhaps there’s a twelve-step program for me. Priest Lovers Anonymous.”