“I'm not going near anything that's going in the crack of his ass!”

“None of us are going to deny what other people are doing. If saying bullshit is somebody's thing, then he says bullshit. If somebody is an ass-kicker, then that's what he's going to do on this trip, kick asses. He's going to do it right out front and nobody is going to have anything to get pissed off about. He can just say, 'I'm sorry I kicked you in the ass, but I'm not sorry I'm an ass-kicker. That's what I do, I kick people in the ass.' Everybody is going to be what they are, and whatever they are, there's not going to be anything to apologize about. What we are, we're going to wail with on this whole trip.”

“Oh, i'm going to kick his ass, and when i'm done, i'm going to squeeze his balls blue.”

“Well if that's the kind of pride you're talking about, you can bet your ass, I'm going to mess with it.”

“His undies had ridden up into the crack of his narrow ass, of which I was treated to a full view of as he turned and tried to go as quietly as possible up the stairs.”

“I'm going to go hunt some zombie," he said. It would have sounded pretty cool if his voice hadn't cracked in the middle of the sentence.”