“I have my moments, I just can't remember where I put them.”

“Some people like to push my buttons!!! I just wish they would give them back...”

“I try not to have personal problems, I do that by telling everyone about them!!!”

“It has been brought to my attention that I may be a verbivore. I consumptor of words, that I subsequently spew forth with considerable consternation.A Volley of verbs that are quite vexing has taken form, perhaps under the guise of consonants most foul!! Where have you wandered faithful vowels?”

“I remember a bully once telling me that he was going to beat the stuffing out of me. After numerous blows it was evident to both of us that I didn't have any!!”

“When I was little and my mom got mad at me she would always say, "You know you can be replaced".I have often wondered if I was.”

“I always wonder how many potholes there are in the road less taken. I mean it's great to go where others don't, but is it maintained?”