“Studies show adolescent males often make decisions based on sex. Many fail to grow out of it.”

“I want lots and lots of sex.""You really are the woman of my dreams.""First round, wet shower sex, after we scrape off a few layers of the Alaskan tundra, then a short and satisfying lunch break. Then a second round of make-the-mattress-sing sex.""I feel a tear of gratitude and awe forming in the corner of my eyes. Don't think less of me.”

“We're going to be rich.Huh?Forgot. You're already rich. I'm going to be rich, and you'll be richerokayI'm serious. We've just discover a non-fail motivation for exercise. Hot jungle sex. We'll be Bill Gates rich. We'll write a book. There'll be DVDs and infomercials.America, then the world, will become buff and sexually satisfied. And they'll have us to thank.”

“Kate studied the clipboard and the pocket calculator on the floor."Did you figure out how to work that thing?""You don't have to be a CPA to use a calculator.""I meant the clipboard.""Ha ha.”

“Let's go have lotsa drunk sex before it hits.""'Kay. Drunk sex for everybody!”

“If that isn't typical male stupidity! If something doesn't work, kick it or swear at it!”

“Happily ever after?" "If justice doesn't triumph and love doesn't make the circle in entertainment fiction, what's the point? Real life sucks too often.”