“If you don't want to tear off the clothes of the person you're on a date with and jump into bed with them, then what's the point? I'd never date; instead, I'd have lots of good friends and hug them a lot and life would be easier and neater and uncomplicated.”
“It's too bad you're not gay. Then again, if you were gay, I would never date you. You're a mess."You know, Patrick? If I were gay, I'd want to date you."Of course.”
“If all my friends jumped off a bridge, I wouldn't jump with them. I'd be at the bottom, hoping to catch them.”
“I'm Dylan. I'm so cool. I want to date myself, but I don't know how! You want to date me instead? You're so lucky!”
“I have no idea why she needs them. I just know that I'd face another plague to get them for her if I had to. Fortunately, it's a lot easier than that. - Elder”
“Don't worry about it. I'd have dumped me too if I was on a romantic date with that!”