“I swear, Santiago! You are an idiot!""I'm only trying to help you along. The guy is all over you and you need to let him know your're interested before some other biker slut, such as yourself, snaps him up with a well-timed blow job.”

“You and me...its our job to try to bring him back, okay? I don't know if we can but...well...I love that guy. And I'm not gonna let him go off the edge if I can help it.”

“Hell if I know. That's for smart people like you to figure out. I'm just trying to get college guys to speed up their blow jobs.”

“I'm falling for you, but I can't do this if your still hung up on a dead guy...you can still love him and love me, but you won't let yourself, Becca.”

“And before you barrel through some idiotic Cosmo girl list of how-well-do-you-know-your-man questions, let me say that I don't know squat about him except that he kisses like a god and screws like a devil.”

“Did you let him know that if he can't see fit to return your blow job immediately, you will have no choice but to sue?”