“I hated to hound the guy at the sausage table, but I wanted to learn the difference between saucisson à l'âne, donkey sausage, and saucisson du taureau, bull sausage. That donkey stuff tastes, well, just a little different.”

“Pride is all very well, but a sausage is a sausage.”

“I spy, with my little eye, something that starts with ... G.""Sausages.”

“I'm a vegetarian.You're a what?I don't eat meat.How can you not eat meat?I just don't.He says he does not eat meat.What?No meat?No meat.Steak?No...Chickens!No...And what about the sausage?No, no sausage, no meat!He says he does not eat any meat.Not even sausage?I know!What is wrong with him?What is wrong with you?Nothing, I just don't eat meat!”

“I want a man who is sunny-side up, with a large sausage, and two hot buns.”

“All the ideas in the universe can be described by words. Therefore, if you simply take all the words and rearrange them randomly enough times, you’re bound to hit upon at least a few great ideas eventually. Sausage donkey swallows flying guillotine, my love assembly line.”