“So you and St. Clair seemed pretty friendly at breakfast.""Um." Is she threatened by me?"I wouldn't get any ideas if I were you," she continues. "Not even you're pretty enough to steal him from his girlfriend. They've been together forever."Was that a compliment? Or not? Her emphasizing is really getting on my nerves. (My nerves.)Amanda gives a fake, bored yawn. "Interesting hair."I touch it self-consciously. "Thanks. My friend bleached it." Bridge added the thick band to my dark brown hair just last week. Normally, I keep the stripe tucked behind my right ear, but tonight it's back in a ponytail."Do you like it?" she asks. Universal bitch-speak for I think it's hideous.I drop my hand. "Yeah.That's why I did it.""You know,I wouldn't pull it back like that. You kinda look like a skunk.""At least she doesn't reek like one." Rashmi appears behind me. She'd been visiting Meredith; I'd heard their muffled voices through my walls. "Delightful perfume, Amanda. Use a little more next time. I don't know if they can smell you in London.”

“Steve Carver-the guy with the faux-surfer hair-and Amanda's best friend, Nicole,are chosen.Rashmi and I groan in a rare moment of camaraderie.Steve pumps a fist in the air.What a meathead.The selecting begins,and Amanda is chosen first. Of course. And then Steve's best friend.Of course. Rashmi elbows me. "bet you five euros I'm picked last.""I'll take that bet.Because it's totally me."Amanda turns in her seat toward me and lowers her voice. "That's a safe bet, Skunk Girl. Who'd want you on their team?"My jaw unhinges stupidly."St. Clair!" Steve's voice startles me. It figures that St. Clair would be picked early. Everyone looks at him, but he's staring down Amanda. "Me," he says, in answer to her question. "I want Anna on my team,and you'd be lucky to have her."She flushes and quickly turns back around,but not before shooting me another dagger.What have I ever done to her?More names are called. More names that are NOT mine. St. Clair goes to get my attention,but I pretend I don't notice. I can't bear to look at him.I'm too humiliated. Soon the selection is down to me, Rashmi,and a skinny dude who, for whatever reason,is called Cheeseburger. Cheeseburger is always wearing this expresion of surprise, like someone's just called his name, and he can't figure out where the voice is coming from."Rashmi," Nicole says without hestitation.My heart sinks.Now it's between me and someone named Cheeseburger. I focus my attention down on my desk, at the picture of me that Josh drew earlier today in history. I'm dressed like a medieval peasant (we're studying the Black Plague), and I have a fierce scowl and a dead rat dangling from one hand.Amanda whispers into Steve's ear. I feel her smirking at me,and my face burns.Steve clears his throat. "Cheeseburger.”

“I'm speechless.I think at the rooftops of Paris.he touches my cheek,pulling my gaze back to him.I suck in my breath."Anna.I'm sorry for what happened in Luxembourg Gardens.Not because of the kiss-I've never had a kiss like that in my life-but because I didn't tell you why I was running away.I chased after Meredith because of you."Touch me again. Please,touch me again."All I could think about was what that bastard did to you last Christmas. Toph never tried to explain or apologize. How could I do that to Mer? And I ought to have called you before I went to Ellie's,but I was so anxious to just end it,once and for all,that I wasn't thinking straight."I reach for him. "St. Clair-"He pulls back. "And that.Why don't you call me Etienne anymore?""But...no one else calls you that.It was weird.Right?""No.It wasn't." His expression saddens. "And every time you say 'St. Clair,' it's like you're rejecting me again.""I have never rejected you.""But you have.And for Dave." His tone is venomous."And you rejected me for Ellie on my birthday. I don't understand.If you liked me so much,why didn't you break up with her?"He gazes at the river. "I've been confused. I've been so stupid.""Yes.You have.""I deserve that.""Yes.You do." I pause. "But I've been stupid,too.You were right.About...the alone thing.”

“Is Etienene okay?""Haven't seen him.He went to Ellie's last night."Just when I thought I couldn't feel any worse.I twist the corners of my pillow. "Did I,uh,say anything weird to him last night?""Apart from acting like a jealous girlfriend and saying you never wanted to speak to him again? No. Nothing weird at all." I moan as she recounts the night for me blow by blow. "Listen," she says when she finishes, "what's the deal with you two?"""What do you mean?""You know what I mean.You two are inseparable.""Except when he's with his girlfriend.""Right.So what's the deal?"I groan again. "I don't know.""Have you guys...you know...done anything?""No!""But you like him.And he likes you, too."I stop choking my pillow. "You think?""Please.The boy gets a boner every time you walk in the room."My eyes pop back open. Does she mean that figuratively or has she actually seen something? No. Focus, Anna. "So why-""Why is he still with Ellie? He told you last night. He's lonely, or at least he's scared of being lonely. Josh says with all of this stuff with his mom, he's been too freaked out to change anything else in his life."So Meredith was right. Etienne is afraid of change. Why haven't I talked about this with Rashmi before? It seems obvious now.Of course she has inside information,because Etienne talks to Josh,and Josh talks to Rashmi."You really think he likes me?" I can't help it.She sighs. "Anna.He teases you all the time. It's classic boy-pulling-girl's-pigtai-syndrome.And whenever anyone else even remotely does it,he always takes your side and tells them to shove it.""Huh."She pauses. "You really like him, don't you?"I'm struggling not to cry. "No.It's not like that.""Liar.So are you getting up today or what? You need sustenance.”

“Anna?""Yeah?"He pauses. "Never mind.""What?""Nothing."But his tone is definitely not nothing. I turn to him, and his eyes are closed. His skin is pale and tired. "What?" I ask again,sitting up. St. Clair opens his eyes, noticing I've moved. He struggles,trying to sit up, too, and I help him. When I pull away, he clutches my hand to stop me."I like you," he says.My body is rigid."And I don't mean as a friend."It feels like I'm swallowing my tongue. "Uh. Um. What about-?" I pull my hand away from his. The weight of her name hangs heavy and unspoken."It's not right.It hasn't been right, not since I met you." His eyes close again,and his body sways.He's drunk. He's just drunk.Calm down,Anna. He's drunk, and he's going through a crisis. There is NO WAY he knows what he's talking about right now. So what do I do? Oh my God, what am I supposed to do?"Do you like me?" St. Clair asks. And he looks at me with those big brown eyes-which,okay,are a bit red from the drinking and maybe from some crying-and my heart breaks.Yes,St. Clair.I like you.But I can't say it out loud, because he's my friend. And friends don't let other friends make drunken declarations and expect them to act upon them the next day.Then again...it's St. Clair. Beautiful, perfect,wonderful-And great.That's just great.He threw up on me.”

“Pardon me, but I wonder if you wouldn't mind switching seats. You see, that's my girlfriend there, and she's pregnant. And since she gets a bit ill on airplanes, I thought she might need someone to hold her hair when... well..."St. Clair holds up the courtesy barf bag and shakes it around. The paper crinkles dramatically. The man sprints off the seat as my face flames. His pregnant girlfriend?”

“What's that?""My friend St. Clair bought it for me. So I wouldn't feel out of place."She raises her eyebrows as she pulls back onto the road. "Are there a lot of Canadians in Paris?"My face warms. "I just felt,you know, stupid for a while. Like one of those lame American tourists with the white sneakers and the cameras around their necks? So he bought it for me, so I wouldn't feel....embarrassed. American.""Being American is nothing to be ashamed of," she snaps."God,Mom,I know.I just meant-forget it.""Is this the English boy with the French father?""What does that have anything to do with it?" I'm angry. I don't like what she's implying. "Besides,he's American. He was born here? His mom lives in San Francisco. We sat next to each other on the plane."We stop at a red light.Mom stares at me. "You like him.""OH GOD,MOM.""You do.You like this boy.""He's just a friend.He has a girlfriend.""Anna has a boooy-friend," Seany chants."I do not!""ANNA HAS A BOOOY-FRIEND!"I take a sip of coffee and choke. It's disgusting. It's sludge. No, it's worse than sludge-at least sludge is organic. Seany is still taunting me. Mom reaches around and grabs his legs,which are kicking her seat again.She sees me making a face at my drink."My,my. Once semester in France, and suddenly we're Miss Sophisticated. Your father will be thrilled."Like it was my choice! Like I asked to go to Paris! And how dare she mention Dad."ANNNN-A HAS A BOOOY-FRIEND!"We merge back onto the interstate. It's rush hour,and the Atlanta traffic has stopped moving. The car behind ours shakes us with its thumping bass. The car in front sprays a cloud of exhaust straight into our vents.Two weeks.Only two more weeks.s”