“Bridget who is crazy said that sometimes she thought about suicide when commercials come on during TV. She was sincere and this puzzled the guidance counselors.”
“She laughed. "Welcome to Camp Meds," She said. "Where the campers are crazy and the counselors want you to take drugs.”
“Because 'You're perfect just the way you are,' is what your guidance counselor says. And she's an alcoholic.”
“Sometimes, when Bridget was in a particularly melodious mood, Sophie thought about stalking downstairs and pushing her into the oven like the with in 'Hansel and Gretel.”
“Lilly was not crazy. She left a serious suicide note.'Sorry,' said the note.'Just not big enough.”
“My advice is to write during commercial breaks, and read while your favorite TV show is on mute.”