“My father had bought him a shirtthat said “Sure you can date my daughter.  In a completely unrelated topic,have you seen my shotgun?”

“a shirt that said “Sure you can date my daughter. In a completely unrelated topic, have you seen myshotgun?”

“Are you insinuatin' that my daughter is a liar?""Oh, no, not at all. I'm saying your daughter is a liar. Surely you can appreciate the difference.”

“I shook my head at him. “Unbelievable. You have no claim here,” I said, gesturing to myself. “You have no right to be upset that I’m dating Jack. You had your chance.”“I guess I’m not as okay with it as I thought I was. I don’t like seeing him with you,” he said, and I wasn’t sure if it was because Jack was a known player or if Jack was suddenly playing with me.”

“Women never bought Freud's idea of penis envy: who would want a shotgun when you can have an automatic?”

“but my dad said it was no excuse."But I love him!" I had never seen my sister cry that much."No, you don't.""I hate you!""No, you don't." My dad can be very calm sometimes."He's my whole world.""Don't ever say that about anyone again. Not even me." That was my mom.”